Episode Forty-One

Cheers

-Smith's Grove. Mid-morning. Cut to a hallway of cells containing mentally unstable psychos, murderers and nutjubs. Cut to cell no. 666. Cut to the point of view of a wall from within the cell. Cut to a pipe in front of the wall. Cut to two hands gripping the pipe. Four fingers from both hands can be seen from the point of view of the wall. Marked on the fingers of the right hand are the letters K-I-L-L. Marked on the four fingers of the left hand are B-M-A-N.

-Cut to the point of the view of the wall as a woman lifts herself up over the hands...it is Kara Strode! And after several months locked away in the sanitarium, she has trained and toughened herself up. After a hard work out, she lets go of the pipe and sits down on her bed. Looking stronger than before and tired out, she looks more determined than ever...very much in the same vein as Linda Hamilton in "Terminator 2: Judgment Day." She was eventually going to go after Michael again! She was going to escape! She didn't know how yet, but she was determined to stop him, once and for all!

CUT TO...the home of Donald Loomis. Cut to his office. Donald sits at his desk, going through his father's old files on the Halloween murders. Set on the desk is a photo of his late father, Sam Loomis, looking a lot like late actor Donald Pleasance. Posted to the wall is sketch of Michael Myers' face.

-Upon identifying Michael's face last fall when a mysterious caller - revealed to be Kara Strode - contacted him about Michael's whereabouts, Donald went to a sketch artist at the FBI. But, when Kara Strode was revealed be behind the Halloween mask - a set up by Michael that only he and Kara knew and realized - the FBI disregarded his questionable identification of Michael and never followed through with a search.

-But, he saw Michael again. In the summer. He was with a boy. Who was that boy? He didn't know who that boy was supposed to be, but he knew one thing: Michael was still living in the city! And, he was going to find him!

-Donald looks through some files:...Laurie Strode - dead; Tommy Doyle - dead; John Tate - dead/suicide; Kara Strode - thought to be dead, but faked death; Danny Strode - remaining in witness protection program; Jamie Lloyd - dead; Stephen Lloyd - missing...Digging through his father's old files and finding no clues, Donald sighs of frustration and mutters to himself.

Donald Loomis: "That Michael! I'll find him! I know I will! Sooner or later, I'll find his whereabouts! And when I do, I'll see to it that he won't come back! Ever!"

CUT TO...the home of detective Mike Norris, Chucky's arch-enemy who looks a lot like actor Chris Sarandon. Cut to his office. Mike sits at his desk, reading through an Inquirer tabloid newspaper, covering a story on the living Good Guy doll that is Chucky.

-The story's title is "Chucky looks angry!" Cut to a shot photo of Chucky casually walking along Woody Allen Ave. Chucky is seen to be sneering at the paparazzi with a "What the fuck are you looking at?!" look on his face, while giving his dollish middle finger. Set on the desk are a stack of several other Inquirer newspapers, as well as Star tabloid newspapers. Desperately looking for clues, Mike sighs of frustation and mutters to himself.

Mike Norris: "I never believed the stories before, but I do now! That Charles Lee Ray, er, 'Chucky', he's back! He really is back! And, I'll find him! I won't rest until I find out his whereabouts and take him down, again, once and for all!"

(Opening montage; cue the song "Summer in The City" by The Lovin' Spoonful)

CUT TO...a townhouse along Woody Allen Ave., Michael's pad. Cut to Michael being woken up up by his annoying alarm clock (Ring! Ring! Ring! Ring!...). Michael sits up and looks around groggily (...Ring! Ring! Ring! Ring!...). Starting to get annoyed by his alarm clock, Michael reaches for it on the nightstand (...Ring! Ring! Ring! Ring!...).

-Michael, as tired as he is, misses his annoying alarm clock (...Ring! Ring! Ring! Ring!...). Getting more annoyed by his alarm clock, Michael's turns his unmasked head to his nightstand (...Ring! Ring! Ring! Ring!...). Seeing his annoying alarm clock continuing its reign of terror, Michael turns to it in a threatening manner (...Ring! Ring! Ring! Ring!...).

-Cut to Michael's blue eyes turning dead-like (...Ring! Ring! Ring! Ring!...). Finally, Michael shrugs and fists his right hand (Clench!) (...Ring! Ring! Ring! Ring!...). Cut to Michael raising his fist with his outstretched arm and smashing his alarm clock with it (...Ring! Ring! Ring! Ri-smash!). Cut to Michael's eyes changing back to blue again. Michael sighs of relief.

Michael Myers: "Much better..."

CUT TO...a random apartment along Woody Allen Ave. Cut to Jason waking up in a bed of the random house. As always, Jason slept over! The bed is a sleep number bed. Jason lays comfortably on his side at number 35.

Jason Voorhees: "Aww..."

-The apartment's resident, whose impaled to his side of the bed with Jason's machete, is "resting" at number 60. Jason sits up and looks around, refreshed. He shrugs.

Jason Voorhees: "Maybe I'll stay here another night. I like this bed!"

-Jason grabs his hockey mask from the night stand and slides it back onto his muggy, deformed and disgusting face. Then, turns to the apartment's resident beside him.

Jason Voorhees: "Excuse me..."

-Jason takes hold of his machete and whips it out of the resident's side of the bed and chest (Shing!). A little burst of blood spurts up from the resident's wound.

Jason Voorhees: "...I'll be needing this!"

CUT TO...Freddy's dreamworld. Freddy is in his private studio. In the studio is a huge flat 100" TV screen, a shelf with videos of his kills, a comfortable leather chair, a computer and a keyboard. It is one big control room where Freddy sets up his "work." Resting up on his leather chair, Freddy wakes up. He looks around groggily. Then, he looks down to his striped shirt, to see it splattered with blood. He was busy that night! Freddy shrugs.

Freddy Krueger: "Aww, fresh blood!"

CUT TO...the local toy store, Dunkin's Toy Chest. Set up in the middle of the huge toy store is a doll house. Mysteriously living inside of the doll house is Chucky, Tiffany and their doll-ish twins, Tobey and Malerie. Chucky sounds busy...

Chucky: "...Uh, uh, uh..."

-Tiffany suddenly wakes up to see Chucky laying over her...

Chucky: "...Uh, uh, uh..."

-Tiffany can't believe it! What a way to wake her up! She looks up at Chucky, sneering at him angerly.

Tiffany: "Chucky!"

-Chucky looks down to his angry bride.

Chucky: "...Oh, uh, Tiff! You're up!"

-Tiffany kicks off Chucky off her (Thud!). Chucky falls over beside and sits up.

Chucky: "What??"

Tiffany: "I told you to wake me up, not fuck me!"

Chucky: "But, you wanted me to fucking surprise you!"

Tiffany: "Not like that! Gosh, I hate when you do this!"

-That's when Tobey and Malerie can be heard crying from their bedroom in the dollhouse.

Tobey: "Waaaaah! Waaaaah!"

Malerie: "Waaaaah! Waaaaah!"

Tiffany: "Now, see what you did? You woke up the twins! You better check them. They probably have to be changed."

-Chucky looks in disbelief.

Chucky: "Changed?? Again? Why, uh, can't you change them?"

Tiffany: "Because I have to shower! After you 'surprised' me, I fucking need it!

-Tiffany looks out the of the dollhouse set up in toy store. Seeing no one around, she sneaks out of the dollhouse window and sneaks around for the restrooms in the back of the store. Meanwhile, the Tobey and Malerie continue crying.

Tobey: "Waaaaah! Waaaaah!"

Malerie: "Waaaaah! Waaaaah!"

-Chucky sighs.

Chucky: "Ah, I hate fucking changing them! Having to constantly sneak around the store with those damn dirty diapers..."

-And that when two of the store employess at the toy store, Rod and Tod, walk by with cart full of toy boxes. Rod and Todd are idiotic 20ish potheads.

Rod: "Dude!"

Tod: "Dude!"

-Chucky immediately jumps out of the way of the dollhouse window.

Chucky: "Oh, shit!"

-As he does, Chucky hears a familiar, mechanical voice.

Good Guy Doll: "Hi, I'm Brian, and I'll be your friend to the end! Heidy ho! Ha! Ha! Ha!"

-And, Rod and Todd stop where they are.

Rod: "Dude, I still can't believe they're making these fucking dolls again!"

Tod: "Yeah, I know! They're so narly!"

-Chucky can't believe it! They're making Good Guy dolls again! Chucky looks around to see a Good Guy box facing him at the window of the doll house. The Good Guy doll in the box acknowledges Chucky's presence, blinks its eyes and turns to him in a mechanical manner.

Good Guy Doll: "Hi, I'm Bobby, and I'll be your friend to the end! Heidy ho! Ha! Ha! Ha!

Chucky: "You got to be fucking kidding me..."

-Rod and Tod laugh as they hear more and more of the Good Guy dolls mechanically turning on and facing each on the cart.

Good Guy Doll #1: "Hi, I like to hugged!"

Good Guy Doll #2: "Hi, I'm Ronald, and I'll be your friend to the end! Heidy ho! Ha! Ha! Ha!"

Good Guy Doll #3: "Hey, want to play?"

Good Guy Doll #4: "Hi, I'm Kenny, and I'll..."

-Chucky sighs and rolls his eyes.

Chucky: "I can't fucking believe this..."

-That's when Tobey and Malerie continue to cry.

Tobey: "Waaaaah! Waaaaah!"

Malerie: "Waaaaah! Waaaaah!"

-Chucky shudders. His and his famiy's cover!

Chucky: "Oh, no..."

-But, Rod and Tod laugh. They think that two of the Good Guy dolls are the one's crying!

Rod: "Dude, they fucking cry too!

Tod: "Yeah, how narly! Waaaaah! Waaaaah!"

-Rod laughs and goes it and goes along with it.

Tod: "Waaaaah! Waaaaah!"

Rod: "Waaaaah! Waaaaah!"

-Chucky laughs and goes along with it, as Tobey and Malerie continue to cry.

Tobey: "Waaaaah! Waaaaah!"

Malerie: "Waaaaah! Waaaaah!"

Chucky: "Waaaaah! Waaaaah!"

Rod: "Waaaaah! Waaaaah!"

Tod: "Waaaaah! Waaaaah!"

CUT BACK TO...Michael's pad. Outside in the front, his neighbor to his left, Jake Forster, walks out of his townhouse and walks over to his mailbox. Then, Michael's neighbor to his right, Dave Hatchet, walks out of his townhouse and heads over to his mailbox. Dave reaches his mailbox and opens the slot. He reaches for his mail and looks at it. Then, Dave turns to Jake two townhouses to his left, who is looking at his mail. He greets him and waves his hand.

Dave Hatchet: "Morning, Jake."

-Jake turns to Dave and greets him back.

Jake Forster: "Morning, Dave."

-That's when Michael, dressed in his shower robe and a white Halloween mask, comes out of his townhouse between them and casually walks over to his mailbox. Jake and Dave turn to him suspicously, then to each other. Their neighbor was creepy! Michael reaches his mailbox and opens the slot. He pulls out his new mail and looks through it.

Michael Myers: "Hmm...bill, bill, junk mail, bill, bill, bill, junk mail..."

-Jake and Dave watch as their creepy neighbor casually looks through his mail. That's when Michael quickly looks back up and turns to Jake. Jake tenses up! Then, Michael turns around to Dave. Dave tenses up big time! Michael turns to them causally to greet them.

Michael Myers: "Hey, good morn..."

-And that's when Jake and Dave both freak out and flee back to their homes.

Jake Forster: "Oh, shit!"

Dave Hatchet: "Aaaaaaahhh!"

-They reach their doors and burst inside (Slam! Slam!). Michael sighs. He only wanted to greet them. They were always so afraid of him for some reason...

CUT BACK TO...Freddy, opening up his dream clinic.

CUT BACK TO...Jason, walking through the entrance of the local liquor store. The manager, a 40ish man, turns to him.

Manager: "Hey, back for more beer?"

-Jason shrugs.

Jason Voorhees: "As always!"

-Jason walks to the back to the store to get a six-pack of Budweiser. As he does, a guy suspiciously walks in looking around all him. He doesn't seem to see Jason in the back. Then, he quickly turns to the manager and points a gun at him. He was a robber!

Robber: "Gimme your money! All of it! Now!"

-The manager, startled, shrugs.

Manager: "Here! Here! It's all yours!"

-The manager opens up the cash register and starts putting all the money together in a paper bag.

Robber: "Faster! Do it faster!"

-The manager struggles to put all the money into the paper bag faster.

Manager: "I am! I am!"

-That's when Jason starts coming back from the back with his six-pack of Budweiser. Upon seeing the robber, he stops in his tracks. He shrugs.

Jason Voorhees: "Are you kidding me?"

-Jason whips out his machete (Shing!).

Jason Voorhees: "Oh, well!"

-Jason swings his machete back and throws it toward the robber (Swish!). The manager continues desperately putting the money from the cash register, when he witnesses a machete slash into the chest of the robber (Shing!). Blood splatters from the robber's wound and onto the counter and manager (Splatter!). Then, the robber's body falls over (Thud).

-The manager, in shocked awe, looks over the counter down at the robber's bloody body on the floor. Then, he looks up to see Jason approaching the counter with a six-pack of Beer. Jason reaches the counter and whips his machete back out of the robber's body (Shing!). A little burst of blood spurts from the wound. Jason turns to him and shrugs.

Jason Voorhees: "Hey, don't mention it."

-The manager is still speechless. So much blood! Jason hands him a bloody $20 bill for his beer.

Jason Voorhees: "Here. Keep the change."

CUT BACK TO...Freddy's dream clinic. Outside on the sidewalk, "hip" and "cool" MTV personality and "American Idol" host, Ryan Seacrest, stops by. He looks up at the sign over the roof of the one-story building - [Dr. Fred Krueger's Dream Clinic - do your dreams scare you?] - Ryan looks outside for a moment, then hesitantly approaches the front door.

CUT TO...the local corner diner, "Restaurant," later on in the late morning. Sitting in a booth is Jerry Seinfeld and Elaine Benes. Elaine sighs.

Elaine Benes: "I still can't believe Puddy's gone..."

(Flashback to "Horror Talk XXXVI: A New Beginning")

-Elaine walks into the garage Puddy works at as a mechanic. She calls for him.

Elaine Benes: "Puddy, I'm here."

-No response.

Elaine Benes: "Puddy?"

-Elaine walks in past a trashed BMW X5 SUV and towards the back of the garage. She looks around.

Elaine Benes: "Puddy? Puddy boy! Where are you?"

-Elaine walks around a corner only to see - Duh, duh, DUH! - Puddy impailed to the back wall with a wrench! Elaine looks in shock.

Elaine Benes: "Oh my God! Puddy! I can't believe this! Puddy! No! Noooo!"

(End of flashback).

-Jerry sighs.

Jerry Seinfeld: "Yeah..."

Elaine Benes: "After were we together so many times...on and off...on and off...on and off..."

Jerry Seinfeld: "After he stole my move..."

Elaine Benes: "After I took his Jesus fish..."

-Jerry and Elaine both sigh. They've always laughed at other's misfortunes, now they feel bad about it. Elaine, recalling Puddy's demise, turns back to Jerry.

Elaine Benes: "Who would do something like that?"

-And that's when Jason, along with Freddy, Michael and Chucky, enters the diner! They are laughing. Approaching the booth next to Jerry's and Elaine's, Michael and Freddy sit at one side, while Jason at the opposite. Chucky climbs onto the seat along with Jason and stands up, just looking over the table. All still laughing, Chucky shrugs.

Chucky: "...Ha, ha, ha, heh...anyway, you guys won't believe what's come back from oblivion!"

Michael Myers: "And, what would that be?"

Chucky: "Good Guy dolls!"

Michael Myers: "You mean...you?"

Chucky: "Fuck, yeah! The company that made me the fucking doll I am now has started up a new line of Good Guy dolls!"

Michael Myers: "You mean...after all the "killer doll" controversy you started years ago?"

Freddy Krueger: "After you went after Andy Barclay?"

Jason Voorhees: "After you went after Andy again?"

Michael Myers: "After you went after Andy again in the Military?"

Freddy Krueger: "After you went on a road trip of blood and mayhem with Tiffany?"

Jason Voorhees: "After you and Tiffany had a seed?"

Michael Myers: "And even after the that rip-off movie, 'Chucky Goes Pyscho'?"

Chucky: "Yes! Fuck, yes! Hell, yes! Freaken', yes! Fuck you, yes! Fuck the fuck in you, yes! Fuck yeah, yes! And yes!"

-Freddy, Jason and Michael laugh out loud. That Chucky.

Chucky: "When I first heard that familiar "Heidy ho! Ha! Ha! Ha!," I shuddered. Not those annoying lines again! But then I thought...'hey, now, it won't be so fucking hard to sneak around Dunkin's Toy Chest anymore!"

Freddy Krueger: "Where??"

Chucky: "Oh. The toy store where me, Tiffany and the twins mysteriously live in."

Freddy Krueger: "Oh, right...you live in a dollhouse in the store, right?"

-Freddy laughs out loud.

Freddy Krueger: "So fitting and ironic! You, you're a doll...and you live in a doll house! Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!"

-Jason and Michael laugh with Freddy. Chucky, the Good Guy doll he is, literally lives in a doll house!

Freddy, Jason and Michael: "Ah, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!..."

-Chucky shrugs.

Chucky: "So what? At least I don't have to pay any fucking rent or bills!"

-That's when the waitress, Judy, 30ish, approaches their table. Judy, used to the four horror icons as customers, even Chucky, casually turns to all of them.

Judy: "Good morning, fellas."

Michael Myers: "Morning, Judy."

Freddy Krueger: "Hey, Judy."

Jason Voorhees: "Hey."

Chucky: "Hey, how the fuck are you?"

-Judy turns to Chucky.

Judy: "Hey, I'm just fine. How the hell is your damned soul, Chuck?"

Chucky: "Straight to hell, that's where!"

-Judy laughs. Then, she hands them their menus.

Judy: "Here's your menus. Enjoy."

-Judy walks away, still laughing to herself. Then, Michael turn to Chucky.

Michael Myers: "Okay, so you and your family have lived in Dunkin's Toy Chest - in a doll house in the store - all this time. Haven't you been caught or seen yet by the customers and people who work there?"

Chucky: "You could say that..."

(Flashback to...)

-Fall, 2003. Afternoon. Chucky is creeping along an iasle, trying not to be seen. That's when a employee, Tim, walks into the iasle. Chucky immediately stops in his tracks and flops to the ground like a life-less doll. Tim spots the Good Guy doll.

Tim: "Huh?"

-Tim walks up the doll. It is a Good Guy doll! He picks up the doll and looks at it

Tim: "What the hell? I thought these weren't made anymore."

-That's when the Good Guy doll looks up at Tim and sneers at him.

Chucky: "That's what you think, fucker!"

Tim: "Oh, shit!"

-Chucky whips out his knife (Shing!) and stabs Tim in the chest (Sha-shing!).

Tim: "Aah! Argh!"

-Chucky stabs Tim again (Shing!). Bursts of blood spray from the wounds.

Tim: "Argh!"

-Not taking it well, Tim falls over (Thud). Falling over with Tim, Chucky gets back up and looks over Tim's body. He's still alive! Chucky shrugs and stabs away at Tim (Shing! Shing! Shing!). Tim coughs up blood.

Tim: "Argh! Argh! Argh!"

-Chucky continues stabbing away at Tim (Shing! Shing!). The blood was everywhere!

Tim: "Argh! Argh!"

-Finally, Chucky stabs Tim one more time (Sha-shing!). Tim coughs up blood and loses it.

Tim: "Argh..."

-Chucky stands back up and prevails.

Chucky: "A classic never goes out of style!"

-That's when Chucky hears commotion among people around him. Chucky runs around the corner of the aisle and flees the situation. Then customers, store employees and children, come to scene to see Tim brutally killed. They look in horror. Who did this??

-Summer, 2004. Midnight. The store is closing and an employee, Lana, is on her way out...when she hears arguing.

Chucky: "...Fuck this! Fuck that!..."

Tiffany: "Chucky, lower your voice! Someone might hear you!"

-And indeed, Lana has heard Chucky. Lana turns around questionably. Chucky?? Lana approaches the doll house she passed. She walks up to a window. She, hesitantly, steps up to the the window and peaks inside. And, that's when Chucky pops out at her with a knife.

Chucky: "Heeerre's Chuuuuucky!"

Lana: "Aaaaaaah!"

-Chucky raises his knife back and swings his knife at Lana (Shing!). Cut to Lana's point of view as blood splatters over her (Splatter!).

-Fall, 2004. Midnight. The store is closing and an employee, Harry, is on his way out...when he suddenly hears crying babies. It is Chucky's and Tiffany's fraternal and dollish twins, Tobey and Malerie!

Tobey: "Waaaaah! Waaaaah!"

Malerie: "Waaaaah! Waaaaah!"

-Harry stops in his tracks. Crying babies? Harry continues hearing them.

Tobey: "Waaaaah! Waaaaah!"

Malerie: "Waaaaah! Waaaaah!"

-Harry follows the crying and finds himself approaching the doll house in the middle of the store. He hears the crying and faint voices.

Tiffany: "Chucky! The twins! You've woken up the twins!"

Chucky: "Oh, fuck! Not again!"

-Harry shrugs. What the hell?? Harry gets down on his knees and opens up the front door of the doll house. He looks inside. And there in the back room are two babies crying.

Tobey: "Waaaaah! Waaaaah!"

Malerie: "Waaaaah! Waaaaah!"

Harry: "What the fuck?"

-Harry tries crawling through the narrow entrance of the doll house. He crawls up to the crying babies.

Tobey: "Waaaaah! Waaaaah!"

Malerie: "Waaaaah! Waaaaah!"

-Harry reaches the babies and looks in disbelief. Not just babies, but dollish babies! That's when the lights go out. The rest of the employees have left, leaving Harry behind!

Harry: "Uh, guys?"

-Then, Harry sees a figure appear to his right. It was Chucky!

Chucky: "What the fuck do you think you're doing my kids?"

-Harry looks in utter disbelief.

Harry: "Um, uh..."

-Then, he hears the front door of the doll house slam behind him (Slam!). Harry struggles to look around in the narrow space of the doll house to see...Tiffany, looking angry!

Tiffany: "Get away from my babies! Now!"

-Harry is in ultimate disbelief, as he witnesses the two dolls walk up to him and take their dollish children away. Chucky and Tiffany rest their twins aside and turn around back to Tim. Tim shudders as Chucky whips out a knife (Shing!). Then, Tiffany approaches him as if to strangle him. Tim is scared shitless!

Tim: "No! No!"

-Chucky, gripping his knife, slowly approaches Tim, while Tiffany reaches for his throat. Pan away from the doll house...

Tim: "Noooo...!"

(End of flashback)

-Michael laughs.

Michael Myers: "You...you are something else, Chucky."

-Chucky shrugs. He sure is. That's when Judy comes back to their booth.

Judy: "Ready with your orders?"

Michael Myers: "Sure am. I will have pancakes."

Jason Voorhees: "I'll also have pancakes."

Chucky: "Scrambled eggs."

Freddy Krueger: "And, I'd like to have a cheese omelet."

-Judy, trying to note down their orders, laughs.

Judy: "Hey, slow down!"

-Judy finishes their order.

Judy: "Okay, so..."

-Judy turns to Michael.

Judy: "...Pancakes..."

-Judy turns to Jason.

Judy: "...Also pancakes..."

-Judy turns to Chucky.

Judy: "...Eggs. Scrambled..."

-Finally, Judy turns to Freddy.

Judy: "...And, and cheese omelet."

-Judy shrugs.

Judy: "In other words, all your usuals."

-Freddy, Jason, Michael and Chucky all shrug.

Judy: "I will be back with your food."

-Judy walks away.

-Freddy turns to Michael.

Freddy Krueger: "Shame about your movie not doing well at the box-office. It made like only $12 million in its opening weekend, and its been struggling to reach even $30 million in the past few weeks."

Jason Voorhees: "Yeah, I know! It's just like 'House of Wax'. That movie was awesome, it was actually a good slasher movie! Even though it had that bitch, Paris Hilton!"

-Freddy high-fives Jason

Freddy Krueger: "You can say that again! That stupid bitch!"

Jason Voorhees: "Yeah! And out of all movies for audiences to single out, they missed out on that one. It only made about $30 million also. It should have done way better than that! Same with your 'Halloween' movie! It was a hell of an ending to your franchise, it totally rocked! Yet, your fans totally abondoned you! Where did they go??"

Michael Myers: "I don't know, but there's a couple of reasons why I think my movie missed the mark. One: It's a 'Halloween' movie, it should have released during Halloween, not the end of summer, around the movie-dumping month of August. It gave people the false idea that the studie 'knew' it was a 'bad' movie and wanted to get rid of it as soon as possible - when in fact, the Dimension film exec.'s, ever the greedy bastards, had complete faith in the film and thought it might go over even better at the end of summer. Just because 'H20' was release around the same time in 1998 and made a hefty $55 million. The were way off on that."

Jason Voorhees: "True that!"

Michael Myers: "Two: I think a lot of fans were too stubborn to accept that anymore storyline could continue beyond the Laurie Strode arc. They wanted nothing, but to see her come back by miraculous circumstances. They didn't want to see John Tate be the one to finally face up against me. They were convinced that because my series started off with Laurie, she was supposed finish it off and be the one to kill me. That was not one necessarily true. She completed her character full circle in 'Halloween: H20' and 'Resurrection,' and faced me."

Freddy Krueger: "You can say that, again!"

Michael Myers: "And three: a lot fans were still really angry at me for doing 'Halloween: Resurrection'. I don't blame them, I fell for their trap and did a rotten movie, nothing like original."

Jason Voorhees: "Well, 'Resurrection' wasn't that bad. You did teach those annoying internet brats a lesson!"

Michael Myers: "Yes, yes I did. But, I should have taught the screenwriters a lesson instead. In fact, I did..."

(Flashback to...)

-Summer, 2002. Midnight. After a mostly poor response to "Halloween: Resurrection" by critics, horror fans and even die-hard "Halloween," fanatics, Michael approaches the house of Larry Brand, who was behind the story of the movie...

-Cut to Larry sleeping in harmony in his bed. Cut to the knob of his bedroom door turning. Cut back to Larry sleeping. Cut to his bedroom door creaking open (Creeeaak!). Cut to Larry being awoken by the creaking. Larry sits up and looks around groggily.

Larry Brand: "Huh?"

-Larry looks forward to see his bedroom door open. He looks out into the darkness of the hallway. That's when he makes out a plain white mask walking out of the darkness. It was Michael Myers! Larry tenses up.

Larry Brand: "Oh, no!"

-Michael enters the bedroom and slowly approaches Larry's bed. Larry tenses up big, sweating bullets. Larry tries to get out of bed, but Michael reaches him and shoves back down. Michael grabs the pillow under Larry's head. Michael looks down at the pillow, then down at Larry. Michael stares him down with his dead-like eyes.

-Cut to Larry's point of view as Michael smothers the pillow against his face (Smother!).

Larry Brand: "Nooo...argh!"

-Larry struggles to breathe.

Larry Brand: "Argh! Argh!"

-Holding the pillow against Larry with his left hand, Michael whips out his knife with his right (Shing!). Larry, struggling to breathe, shudders.

Larry Brand: "Argh! Argh!"

-Michael raises his knife back with his outstretched arm. Then, he takes it and swings it into the pillow (Shing!). Larry instantly loses it and stops moving. He was gone.

-Fall, 2002. Evening. Cut to the home of Sean Hood, who wrote the screenplay to "Halloween: Resurrection." Cut to Sean writing the screenplay for "Chucky Goes Psycho." Cut to the knob of his office door turning. Cut back to Sean eagerly writing his ridiculous script. Cut to his office door creaking open (Creeeaak!). Hearing the creaking, Sean looks around. His office door was open, revealing dark hallway. That's when he makes out a plain white mask walking through the darkness. It was Michael Myers! Sean tenses up.

Sean Hood: "Oh, no! I knew this day was coming!"

-Sean gets up from his desk. He walks back, stopping at the back wall. Michael enters the office and approaches Sean.

Sean Hood: "No! No!"

-Michael continues to slowly approach Sean. No way was he letting him get away!

Sean Hood: "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Leave me alone! Please!"

-Michael closely appraches Sean. Sean shrugs and tries to run around Michael, but Michael swiftly grabs him by the shoulder and shoves him back against the wall (Thud!). Sean, shaken, turns to Michael. Michael stares him down with his dead-like eyes. Sean tenses up big time!

Sean Hood: "No! No!"

-Michael grabs Sean by his throat, as if to strangle him.

Sean Hood: "Argh!"

-Michael steps back, so he can raise Sean into the air with his outstretched arms.

Sean Hood: "Argh! Argh!"

-Michael raises Sean up and starts strangling him.

Sean Hood: "Argh! Argh!"

-Michael continues strangling Sean, trying to squeeze every bit of life out of him.

Sean Hood: "Argh! Argh! Argh!"

-Michael strangles at Sean's neck harder and harder.

Sean Hood: "Argh! Argh! ARGH!"

-Cut to Sean's point of view as he watches Michael's dead-like eyes burn into his soul.

Sean Hood: "Argh! ARGH!"

-Finally, Sean loses it.

Sean Hood: "ARGH! Argh..."

-Sean's head sags down and his feet flail. Michael drops the body (Thud) and looks down at his poor Sean, tilting his head.

(End of flashback)

Michael Myers: "...You see, I wasn't going to let those fools get away with another awful horror script, certainly not for you, Chucky."

-Chucky high-fives Michael (Slap!).

Chucky: "Thanks!"

-Jason high-fives Michael (Slap!).

Jason Voorhees: "Great handiwork!"

Michael Myers: "Thanks."

Freddy Krueger: "So, what about Busta Rhymes? I know your fans just 'loved' him in 'Resurrection'! Are you ever going to take care of him?"

-Jason shrugs.

Jason Voorhees: "Yeah! I want to know, too!"

Michael Myers: "Someday. Maybe someday..."

-That's when Michael's cell phone rings. The ring tone is the eerie "Halloween" theme. Michael answers it.

Michael Myers: "Hello?"

Ghostface: "What's up?!"

-Michael looks speechless. Freddy, Jason and Chucky turn him, then to each other questionably. Finally, Michael shrugs.

Michael Myers: "Oh...my...God."

-Ghostface snickers.

Michael Myers: "Surprised, huh?"

Michael Myers: "Not surprised, just disgusted really."

Ghostface: "What's your favorite scary movie?!"

Michael Myers: "I have a better question: How do you guys keep getting my number??"

Ghostface: "The same we always get the characters' numbers in the 'Scream' and 'Stab' movies. A magician never reveals his tricks!"

Michael Myers: "You know what, I'm really tired of you guys. Just give it up already. Tell me who you are and we'll have a big laugh over it."

Ghostface: "Why should I do that?"

Michael Myers: "Look, I know you aren't John Tate. He's dead and buried. I also know you aren't Kara Strode. She's locked up in Smith's Grove and I don't think she'd waste her one phone call on this bullshit. Just give it up already."

Ghostface: "No way! I have a grudge against you too, and I'm not going to let it fly by!"

Michael Myers: "Oh, really? Well, how about this? Don't call me again...or else!"

-Michael hangs up Ghostface (Beep!). Freddy, Jason and Chucky turn to him.

Freddy Krueger: "Who was that?"

Michael Myers: "Who do you think?

Freddy Krueger: "Uh...Ghostface?"

Michael Myers: "You got it."

Jason Voorhees: "Kara Strode?"

Michael Myers: "I don't think so."

Freddy Krueger: "Well, what did he, or she, say?"

Michael Myers: "Oh, the usual. 'What's up?!,' 'What's your favorite scary movie?!,' the works. And naturally, I told Ghostface off. I'm tired of this bullshit."

Freddy Krueger: "Who do you think it is?"

Michael Myers: "Personally, I don't care who it is. I just hope that joker won't call me again."

Chucky: "Gee, you guys always have these arch-enemies. Me? I never do! I only have Leprechaun! He's been challening me to fight with him for some fight-off at Pinhead's night club."
Jason Voorhees: "'Chucky vs. Leprechuan'? Narly!"

Chucky: "Well, it ain't happeing! Not in my book! That would be like throwing my dignity out of the window! No way am I resorting to the versus fad! Never!"

-Freddy laughs.

Freddy Krueger: "'Chucky vs. Leprechuan'? Ah, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!..."

Chucky: "What's so funny?"

Freddy Krueger: "...Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!..."

Chucky: "What's so fucking funny??"

-Freddy calms down.

Freddy krueger: "...Ha, ha, heh...Nothing! Nothing at all! It's just that..."

-Freddy turns to Michael, to Jason, then back to Chucky.

Freddy Krueger: "...Pinhead wants you to do it, because of that fight Mike and Jason here had!"

Chucky: "A fight between...Mike and Jason...'Michael vs. Jason'? No fucking way!"

Jason Voorhees: "Yes way! I challenged Mike and slaughtered him all over the place!"

Michael Myers: "Actually, he was too drunk to remember the fight at all."

-Jason sighs.

Jason Voorhees: "I wish I remembered...."

Michael Myers: "You see, I woke up from my drunkenness and found myself strangling Jason in the parking lot of Pinhead's night club. From what I heard from Pinhead and the rambling drunks watching what happened, Jason and I fight almost to the death. I guess Jason stirred me up and I was too drunk to control my senses and fight off my evil."

-Freddy sighs.

Freddy Krueger: "And, I missed it. I missed only chance to see...'Michael vs. Jason'..."

Chucky: "So, what the does this have to do with me and fucking Leprechaun?"

Michael Myers: "Apparantly, the crowd loved our fight. It was like a show to them. Pinhead offered Jason and I to fight off every week. He would have payed us a hefty sum of money."

Jason Voorhees: "Yeah, and you missed out! Why did you refuse?"

Michael Myers: "Because, I don't want to fight you. Not like that again. I almost killed you. I almost...strangled you to death. I was relieved when you came back."

Freddy Krueger: "So, you won?"

Michael Myers: "You could say that. I dominated over Jason. Jason challenged me and I showed him."

-Jason immediatly shrugs up in defense.

Jason Voorhees: "That was not true! I slaughtered you all over the place!"

Michael Myers: "Then, how come you didn't remember the fight? How come you had to ask me what had happened? Answer: you were drunk!"

-Jason sighs.

Jason Voorhees: "I wish I remembered what happened..."

Michael Myers: "So anyway..."

-Michael turns to Chucky.

Michael Myers: "...Our big versus fight gave Pinhead an idea. He thinks he could see you fighting off with Leprechuan as an equally entertaining show. Apparently, that's what people would love to see. That's why he's hassling you."

Chucky: "Oh."

-That's when Judy comes back to their table with their food.

Judy: "Here's your breakfast, fellas."

-Freddy, Jason, Michael and Chucky take their food. Jason immediately digs into his pancakes, he's hungry! As he does, Jason ends up scrambling his food against his hockey mask. He forgot to take off his hockey mask! Freddy, Michael, Chucky and Judy laugh at Jason.

-Jason shrugs and slides off his hockey mask, revealing his muggy, deformed and disgusting face. Judy, upon seeing the grisley sight, turns away. Then, Michael takes off his white Halloween mask, revealing his handsome, unscarred face, so that he can eat. Judy looks back at Michael, overwhelmed.

CUT TO...the local coffee shop, "Central Perk," later on in the mid-afternoon. Freddy, Jason, Michael, Chucky, Pinhead and Leatherface chill out at the couch and two chairs set in the middle of the shop. Pinhead turns everybody.

Pinhead: "I must apoligize. I will not be available for next week's game of poker, to win all your money..."

-Michael rolls eyes.

Pinhead: "...I have an upcoming meeting with the underworld that I must attend to."

-Freddy snickers.

Freddy Krueger: "Underworld, huh? Who will this be with? Satan? The Devil? The big guy?"

Pinhead: "You could say that."

Leatherface: "I won't be able to play, either. I'm going home to see my family for a big get-together."

Michael Myers: "Say, isn't there some political Anti-Bush compaign going on there in Texas next week?"

-Leatherface shrugs.

Leatherface: "There sure is!"
Michael Myers: "And knowing you, and your questionable family, you're all going to be pretty hungry, aren't you?"

Leatherface: "We sure are!"

-Michael shrugs.

Michael Myers: "Well, enjoy your vacation. Get plenty to eat!"

-Leatherface licks his lips.

Leatherface: "Oh, there will be plenty! In fact, I'm hungry right now!"

-Leatherface whips out a big fat, human arm. He looks at it in a hungry manner.

Leatherface: "Mmmm!"

-Leatherface shrugs and turns to munch on the human arm. That's when the coffee shop's manager, Gunther, approaches them.

Gunther: "Excuse me..."

-Leatherface stops what he's doing.

Gunther: "...you'll have to put that away or eat that outside."

-Leatherface's stomach grumbles. Then, he turns to Gunther questionably.

Leatherface: "And, why would that be?"

Gunther: "Sir, its one thing to take outside food here. It's another to eat, well, people."

-Leatherface's stomach grumbles again. Feeling hungry, Leatherface shrugs.

Leatherface: "But, I'm hungry!"

Gunther: "If you are, you'll have to eat that outside."

Leatherface: "But, you don't have to worry about me! I won't leave a mess! I don't leave any leftovers! Any!"

Gunther: "It doesn't matter. It's still outside food."

-Leatherface sighs.

Leatherface: "Ehh..."

-Then, he turns to Gunther and puts the human arm back inside his jacket.

Leatherface: "All right..."

-Gunther shrugs and walks away. Leatherface watches as Gunther walks back to the counter. Then, he looks at Gunther in a hungry manner. He licks his lips.

Leatherface: "Mmmm!"

Freddy Krueger: "Forget about it, Leatherface! He's mine!"

Leatherface: "What? Why?"

Freddy Krueger: "He's having an appointment with me at my dream clinic in three days."

Michael Myers: "You mean, you're already taking in appointments ahead of time?"

Freddy Krueger: "I sure am! My little business is proving to be quite successful. I told you guys that the miserable people in this city would buy it! In fact..."

-Freddy turns directly to Jason, then to Leatherface

Freddy Krueger: "...Some of you guys are killing my business!"

Michael Myers: "What you are talking about?"

-Freddy turns to Michael.

Freddy Krueger: "Not you!"

-Freddy turns to Jason.

Freddy Krueger: "You're killing my customers, what with all your little killing sprees around town!"

Jason Voorhees: "What?? How would you know that?"

Freddy Krueger: "Because! I already know ahead of time when New Yorkers start thinking of checking out my dream clinic. Because, I'm always invading their dreams at night!"

Jason Voorhees: "What? You peeping Tom! I can't help that my 'business' is going to interfere with yours! It's not my fault!"

-Freddy turns to Leatherface.

Freddy Krueger: "And, you! You're eating up my other customers! For breakfast, for lunch and for dinner!"

-Leatherface shrugs.

Leatherface: "And, for snacks as well. Sorry!"

Michael Myers: "Hey, New York is big city with a huge overpopulatation. Aside from Jason and Leatherface's 'businesses,' you should still remain very busy."

Freddy Krueger: "Yeah, I guess so."

-Freddy shrugs.

Freddy Krueger: "In fact, ever since opening up dream clinic this summer, I've had some very interesting sessions with celebrities."

Michael Myers: "Really?"

Freddy Krueger: "Sure have..."

CUT TO...Dr. Fred Krueger's dream clinic earlier that day. "Hip" and "cool" MTV personality and "American Idol" host, Ryan Seacrest, is there for a session over his questionable dreams. Ryan has fallen asleep on the sofa in Dr. Fred Krueger's office. Dr. Fred Krueger prepares to invade Ryan's dreams...

Dr. Fred Krueger: "It's showtime!"

CUT TO...Ryan's dreams. It is the end of an "American Idol" show. Ryan, on the stage of the auditorium, faces the screaming teeney-bopper fans to close the program.

Ryan Seacrest: "...This is 'American Idol.' Stay tuned tomorrow night for the results show. Seacrest out."

-As the show ends and as the lights in the auditorium darken, Ryan mutters to himself under his breath.

Ryan Seacrest: "...Of the closet."

CUT BACK TO...the local coffee shop, "Central Perk."

Michael Myers: "Wait. So, Ryan Seacrest is gay?"

Freddy Krueger: "He sure is! In fact, nearly half of the New Yorkers who've come to me for help have turned out gay! Their dreams tell me that they are all in extreme denial!"

Michael Myers: "Wow! With that number of gay people..."

-Freddy shrugs.

Freddy Krueger: "Not that there's anything wrong with that!"

Michael Myers: "...No, of course not! But, you must be turning over a lot of people to The Creeper!"

Freddy Krueger: "I sure am! When those pacients refuse to believe my diagnosis of their dreams, I tell them, there's another 'doctor' out there that can help them! I don't know anybody else to turn them to! Man, the number of favors The Creeper owes me..."

-Jason, Michael, Chucky and Leatherface laugh. That Freddy. Pinhead turns to Freddy.

Pinhead: "I still don't understand how you can run this 'business' of yours."

Freddy Krueger: "And, why is that?"

Pinhead: "Aren't the people aware that you are, AHEM, Freddy Krueger, a.k.a. The Dream Master and The Springwood Slasher? I don't know why they don't just run out on you as soon as they see you."

Freddy Krueger: "I'd say a portion of the people recognize me from my movies. And, they know that I cross their private thoughts, etc., when I invade their dreams. But, that's why the sessions are confidential."

Pinhead: "So, you are really helping them?"

Freddy Krueger: "Uh, yeah. Why?"

Pinhead: "Funny, I thought that you started up that damned business of yours as a desperate resort to kill more people in their dreams."

Freddy Krueger: "What, like the way you lure people into your club to become potential cenobites? Of course not! I opened up this clinic, because I've invaded the dreams of a lot of people in this city. And, they so are miserable and questionable of their dreams, they have been asking for clinic like mine."

Pinhead: "Yes, I now see what you mean. Most of the people I lure into my club are so down on their own damned souls, its depressing. I want to kill people who are happy, damnit! It makes my work more enjoyable."

Freddy Krueger: "Yeah, exactly! I thought I'd liven up this city. Maybe by starting this 'business,' it might be fun to kill people again, in their dreams and in hell."

Pinhead: "Yes! Yes! Now, I understand you! Maybe we ought to become partners in this 'business'. You help the people with their damn dreams, then you turn them over to another 'doctor' like me."

Freddy Krueger: "Um...I think I'll have to think about that."

Pinhead: "But, what's their to think about? Think of the money! The money!"

-Michael laughs.

Michael Myers: "You know, Pinhead, I think that night club of yours has gotten to your head. Asking Jason and I to fight off for 'show', making the same offer to Chucky and Leprechaun, you becoming so greedy...if you ask me, I think you've spent too much time in that club of yours."

-Pinhead sneers back at Michael.

Pinhead: "Well, I didn't ask you, did I? So, shut up!"

Freddy Krueger: "Actually, I think Mike's right."

Pinhead: "Well, what do you know? You hide from reality in your damn dream world!"

-Freddy turns to Pinhead angerly.

Freddy Krueger: "You didn't just say that!"

-Pinhead faces Freddy intensely.

Pinhead: "Oh, I did! I did say that! I said it with all the bizarre twists Hell has to offer!"

-Freddy and Pinhead stand up and face each other intensely. Was it 'Freddy vs Pinhead'?? Michael stops them.

Michael Myers: "Okay, that's enough you two!"

-Michael turns to Pinhead.

Michael Myers: "Pinhead, you've been working at your night club too often lately. You need a vacation, in Hell!"

-Michael turns to Freddy.

Michael Myers: "And Fred, you need to let go your ego. I can't be there everytime Pinhead or Jason, or even Ash, meshes with you..."

-Leatherface, feeling left out, shrugs.

Leatherface: "Ahem."

Michael Myers: "...You and Jason already trashed my pad because of it."

-Freddy and Pinhead sigh and sag back on the couch. Leatherface looks around to see everyone silent. He's about to shrug when Pinhead turns to Chucky.

Pinhead: "Chucky, I have an offer you can't refuse."

Chucky: "Look, whatever you're selling, I don't fucking care. I'm not going to fight off with fucking Leprechaun. That would be fucking beneath me."

Pinhead: "One night. Every week. Half the proceeds will go to you and Leprechaun. Oh, if you can only imagine how many people would be interested in such a fight. They would love it!..."

-Leatherface, feeling more left out, shrugs.

Leatherface: "Ahem."

Pinhead: "...And the money that you, on your name-value alone, could bring! You don't know what you're missing!"

Chucky: "Eh, whatever."

Pinhead: "Hey, you can't 'whatever' me! I'm Pinhead!"

Chucky: "Yeah, and I'm Chucky! I don't give a flying fuck!"

Pinhead: "Fine. But, you're missing out a great opportunity."

Chucky: "Blah, blah, fucking blah!"

-Michael turns to Pinhead.

Michael Myers: "Hey, have you forgotten, Pinhead? Those 'Helloween' rumors? Don't you remember how angry we both were when Dimension seriously considered that project when 'Freddy vs. Jason' became a hit?..."

Leatherface: "Ahem!"

Michael Myers: "...Well, why would you be so excited now to promote 'Michael vs Jason' or 'Chucky vs. Leprechaun'? It doesn't seem like you at all."

Pinhead: "I'm promoting fights, not worthless movies."

Michael Myers: "But, even so. You've never been known to sell out names to versus fads and worthless spinoffs of some sort. That's why I think you need a vacation."

Pinhead: "Vacation? Me? Why, I never!"

-Leatherface shrugs.

Leatherface: "Ahem!"

Michael Myers: "Fine. Be that way."

-Michael turns back to Leatherface.

Michael Myers: "And, what's the matter with you, Leatherface?"

Leatherface: "Me? Little old me? You mean you guys finally care about how I feel? Well, fine!"

-Leatherface shrugs.

Leatherface: 'Freddy vs. Jason'! 'Freddy vs. Jason vs. Ash'! 'Michael vs. Jason'! 'Chucky vs. Leprechaun'! And freaken' 'Helloween'! Whatever happened to me? What about my name? Why won't anybody think of a versus movie or something for me??"

Michael Myers: "What are you the hell talking about? Are you actually jealous that you're not being compared to another horror in some ridiculous rumor or fight?"

Leatherface: "Well, um...yeah!"

Michael Myers: "I didnt realize you felt that way."

Freddy Krueger: "Neither did I."

Jason Voorhees: "Nada."

Chucky: "Ehh."

Pinhead: "I certainly didn't notice."

Leatherface: "Yeah, well I want to be a part of this 'versus' thing, too! You guys are either having these versus movies, or fight-offs outside of the movies! I want to be a part of that!"
Michael Myers: "Well, Leatherface, are your really sure you want to? I mean, I had fight off with Jason, but all it really was, was a drunken brawl."

Pinhead: "And, while I still see myself promoting fights at my club, I certainly don't want to do 'Helloween'."

Jason Voorhees: "Hey, I like the attention with these fights, I mean, I've been in three of them! Freddy, Freddy and Ash, and Michael! But, in the end, even though I regret not remembering my bout with Michael, I get tired of it."

Freddy Krueger: "Yeah, I certainly am."

Michael Myers: "You know what these 'versus' movies and fight-offs are? Wrap-ups to our careers. We've already been in enough movies..."

-Jason shrugs.

Jason Voorhees: "Ahem!"

Michael Myers: "...Well, maybe not Jason. But, after a lot sequels, the audience gets tired of it all. And, the only thing left to do is to fight off with another. 'Freddy vs. Jason' started it all around the 1980's horror boom, but its the number of versus products that are looking ridiculous now. We don't 'Helloween,' 'Chucky vs. Leprechaun,' or even 'Freddy vs. Pinhead'. I mean, this versus fad is starting to tear us apart..."

-Michael turns back to Leatherface.

Michael Myers: "...But you, Leatherface, should actually feel lucky that you haven't become entrapped in the versus gossip and been dragged through mud of it all. Besides, you already had your glory. You already your big career big wrap. You had your retaliation at the premier of the remake of your classic, 'The Texas Chainsaw Massacre'. Remember?"

Leatherface: "Hey, that's right! That blashphamous remake! I showed them! I don't need a versus movie or fight! I'm Leatherface!

-Leatherface prevails. Everybody else shrugs. Then, Michael's cell phone rings. He answers.

Michael Myers: "Hello?"

Ghostface: "What's up?!"

-Michael sighs.

Michael Myers: "Oh, not you again."

Ghostface: "Yes, it is me! It is, I, Ghostface! Mwa, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!"

Michael Myers: "Oh, how scary!"

Ghostface: "Well, how about this for scary? I know where you are! I know where you, Freddy, Jason, Chucky, Pinhead and Leatherface are! You're at Central Perk right now as I speak!"

-Michael looks around to the front of the coffee shop. Freddy, Jason, Chucky, Pinhead and Leatherface all look after. There outside on the other side of the front glass window of the coffee shop was Ghostface, holding a voice box up to the mouth of his/her ghost mask. Ghostface waves his/her hands around.

Ghostface: "See? I'm right here! Come here and get me! Mwa, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!"

Michael Myers: "You know what? I don't care about chasing you. You don't scare me, and I don't have the slightest curousity about your 'secret identity.' Just go home and leave us alone."

Ghostface: "Me go home? I don't think so!"

Michael Myers: "Fine. Don't go home. Why don't you just hassle Wes Craven or Roman Bridger instead for not making any more of those 'Scream' or 'Stab' movies of yours? Why else do you guys keep dressing up in the same pathetic disguise? It's so cliched!"

Ghostface: "You're 'Halloween' movies are cliched! Even that last one, 'Halloween: Blood of Michael Myers'!"

Michael Myers: "Oh, give me a break! All the 'Scream' and 'Stab' movies have more cliches to offer than the 'Halloween,' 'Friday The 13th,' 'A Nightmare on Elm Street,' 'Child's Play,' 'Hellraiser' and 'Texas Chainsaw Masscare' films put together!"

-Jason shrugs.

Jason Voorhees: "Yeah, you tell 'em, Mike!"

Freddy Krueger: "Yeah!"

Michael Myers: "You see? I don't care. Go off and hassle someone else instead. I'm not not threatened or bothered by you at all. Bye!"

-Michael hangs up his cell phone (Beep!) and turns away from the front window of the shop. So does the others. Ghostface stays there waving at them in mock fashion.

Michael Myers: "Is Ghostface still there?"

-Jason takes a quick look.

Jason Voorhees: "Yep."

-Ghostface continues waving at them outside of the shop. Then, he whips out a knife (Shing!). He mockingly stabs at him/herself, pretending to die (Swish! Swish!).

Ghostface: "Bleah! Bleah!"

-Then, Ghostface whips out a machete (Shing!), and mockingly stabs it at him/herself (Swish! Swish!).

Ghostface: "Bleah! Bleah!"

-Finally, Jason shrugs.

Jason Voorhees: "That's it! I'm getting him!"

Freddy Krueger: "Or, her!"

Jason Voorhees: "Whatever!"

-Jason gets up approaches the entrance of the coffee shop. Ghostface stops and watches as Jason comes for him/her, whipping out his machete (Shing!). Jason walks outside and Ghostface runs for it and around the corner. Jason heads back inside to others.

Jason Voorhees: "Eh, that chicken shit ran off."

Michael Myers: "He'll be back."

CUT TO...Pinhead's night club, later in the evening. It is a big, dark rectangular building, two stories high. Over the second story at the entrance is a giant figure of Pinhead's head, with the pins flickering assorted bright lights. Above the head are big letter's - PINHEAD's. All around the outside of the club, flickering bright lights abound like a path around the first and second story.

-Cut to the point of view of a mysterious figure entering the night club. Inside is a huge, dark room lit by bright lights going around the wall. Along the back and side walls are bars, where Pinhead's cenobites serve as bartenders. Around the bars, are tables where assorted people gather and drink to their heart's content. In the middle of the room is a huge dance floor, where several people are dancing. A few chains are seen hanging from the ceiling with blood dripping off.

-Cut to the point of view of the mysterious figure walking up to a side bar. The mysterious figure looks around and sees Freddy, Jason, Michael, Chucky and The Tall Man sitting at a table. The mysterious figure shrugs and sits on a stool at the side bar, watching them.

The Tall Man: "...I must say, I was impressed with your 'Halloween' movie."

Michael Myers: "Thanks."

The Tall Man: "That's the kind of wrap up all our franchises need."

Chucky: "I already had mine. In a way, 'Seed of Chucky' took my series full circle. Ever since the beginning of my franchise, I was desperately trying to transport my soul, without success, into another body. And by 'Seed,' when Tiff and I had had our twins and were ready to become human again, I had second thoughts..."

-Chucky shrugs and imitates his classic line from "Seed of Chucky"

Chucky: "...I am Chucky, the killer doll! I dig it!"

-Freddy, Jason, Michael and The Tall Man laugh. That Chucky. The Tall Man turns to him.

The Tall Man: "Well, I'm glad you're happy."

Freddy Krueger: "In a way, 'Freddy vs. Jason' was wrap up for Jason and I. There's no telling if we'll be able to do solo movies again, or possibly 'Freddy vs. Jason 2,' but if this is indeed our final movie, its one hell of an ending for us!"

Jason Voorhees: "Eh, I guess you're right. I really, really, REALLY want to do 'Friday The 13th Part XI: Return To Crystal Lake'...but, if 'Jason vs. Freddy' really turns out to be our last movie, together, I guess it's not a bad way to go out. At least we pleased our fans."

Freddy Krueger: "You mean, AHEM, 'Freddy vs. Jason'."

Jason Voorhees: "That's what I said."

Freddy Krueger: "No, you didn't! You said 'Jason vs. Freddy'! I thought you were over that switched title bullshit."

Jason Voorhees: "I am. 'Jason vs. Freddy' hit big with the fans and they loved. I'm sorry, I mean 'Freddy vs Jason'!"

-Freddy turns to Jason questionably. Then, Michael stops him.

Michael Myers: "Let him be. He's only playing around with your ego."

-Michael turns to The Tall Man.

Michael Myers: "So, this leaves only you left. What's the latest on 'Phantasm's End'? I understand that would be your big wrap-up to your franchise."

The Tall Man: "Yes, it would be. And last that I've heart, Don Coscarelli is taking his time with pre-production."

Michael Myers: "Well, its getting off to some start. That's good."

-Michael shrugs and raises his glass of Molson Ice.

Michael Myers: "Cheers to 'Halloween: The Blood of Michael Myers'!"

-The Tall Man raises his glass of Heineken.

The Tall Man: "Cheers to, hopefully soon, 'Phantasm's End'!"

-Jason raises his glass of Budweiser.

Jason Voorhees: "Cheers to 'Jason vs. Freddy'!"

-Freddy raises his glass of Budweiser.

Freddy Krueger: "Cheers to, AHEM, 'Freddy vs. Jason'!"

-Chucky raises his glass of Heineken.

Chucky: "And cheers to 'Seed of Chucky'!"

-The group all take their drinks and gulp them down. Then, they set their glassed back onto the table. Jason shrugs and slides his hockey mask back over his muggy, deformed and disgusting face.

Jason Voorhees: "I don't know about you guys, but I gotta go drain the lizard!"

-Jason gets up and heads for the restroom. That's when Michael's cell phone rings. Michael braces himself and answers.

Michael Myers: "H-Hello?"

Ghostface: "W-what's up?!"

-Michael sighs.

Michael Myers: "Hello, Ghostface."

Ghostface: "Hello, Michael! And say hi to Freddy, Jason, Chucky and The Tall Man for me while at it!"

Michael Myers: "Sure..."

-Michael turns to Freddy and Chucky.

Michael Myers: "...It's Ghostface. He's back again."

Freddy Krueger: "You mean she's back."

Michael Myers: "Whatever."

-Freddy, Michael and Chucky suspiciously look around. No sign of Ghostface at the surrounding tables or side bar.

The Tall Man: "Who are we looking for?"

Michael Myers: "Ghostface. He, or she, has been hassling us again."

The Tall Man: "Oh...gotcha."

-The Tall Man looks around suspiciously for Ghostface. Michael replies back to Ghostface.

Michael Myers: "Having fun?"

Ghostface: "Sure am!"

Michael Myers: "Enjoying yourself?"

Ghostface: "You can say that!"

Michael Myers: "Good...now, listen to me and listen to me goo. Leave us alone...or else. We've had it with Ghostfaces, jokers and those with real agendas. I don't know who you might possibly, nor I do care. Just leave us alone, okay?"

Ghostface: "No way! Not with you guys still getting to play in your own movies! I can't anymore!"

Michael Myers: "Ah...so you're jealous of us."

Ghostface: "I sure am! And, I'm going to let you guys get away with it! Never!..."

CUT TO...Jason in the restroom. Washing his hands, Jason silently sings to himself the song Alice Cooper wrote for him, "He's Back (The Man Behind The Mask)."

Jason Voorhees: "...I'm back! Duh, nuh, duh! The man behind the mask! Dun, nuh, nuh! And, I'm out of control!..."

-That's when Jason hears a familiar voice in a bathroom stall.

Jason Voorhees: "What the...?"

-Jason looks around suspiciously to the last stall to the wall...

Ghostface: "...You guys keep getting to play in the same crappy movies! Again and again! Especially Jason! But, not Ghostface! Ghostface can only do four 'Stab' movies that's it!..."

CUT BACK TO...Freddy, Michael, Chucky and The Tall Man at their table

Michael Myers: "...And, three 'Scream' movies too, right?"

Ghostface: "Yeah, and only three 'Scream' movies too! And, it sucks! I still have more to offer! And, they won't let me play anymore because 'Stab 4' bombed last year!"

Michael Myers: "Well, it was a poor sequel."

Ghostface: "No, it wasn't! It was great! It was a great 'Stab' movie, brilliantly directed! People just didn't get it!..."

-That's when Jason arrives back to their table.

Jason Voorhees: "You guys won't believe this!..."

-Jason turns to Michael silently.

Jason Voorhees: "...Put your cell phone away..."

-Michael quietly puts his cell phone away in the left pocket of his blue overalls. Jason turns to everyone silently.

Jason Voorhees: "Ghostface is in the bathroom stall. Right now! I heard him! Or, her!"

Michael Myers: "You sure?"

Jason Voorhees: "Yeah! I peaked under the stall and saw the black cloak and outfit."

-Michael shrugs and puts his white Halloween mask back on.

Michael Myers: "Then, let's get 'em!"

Freddy Krueger: "Yeah!"

Jason Voorhees: "Yeah, let's get 'em!"

-Michael turns to Chucky and The Tall Man.

Michael Myers: "We'll be right back."

The Tall Man: "Good luck catching the culprit."

Chucky: "Yeah, get the fucker!"

-Freddy, Jason and Michael get up and head for the bathroom. As they do, Michael quietly whips his cell phone back out of his pocket. With the line still on, Ghostface is still rambling!

Ghostface: "...'Freddy vs. Jason' sucked! 'Halloween: The Blood of Michael Myers' sucked! 'Seed of Chucky' sucked! But, 'Stab 4' rules! It was a great, under-appreciated movie and that's why I'm getting back you guys! To stop your sucky movies...once and for all!"

Michael Myers: "Oh, really?"

Ghostface: "Yes, really!"

-Michael quietly open the restroom door. He quietly steps inside the restroom. Freddy and Jason quietly follow after. They look at the stall of the end of restroom.

Michael Myers: "Well, since you've gone to all this trouble to get us, I have an interesting question for you."

Ghostface: "Oooh! Do tell!"

Michael Myers: "What would you say if...Freddy, Jason and I were watching you right now?"

-In the stall, Ghostface tenses up.

Ghostface: "Uh, say that again?"

Michael Myers: "What would you say if we knew where your were, at this very moment, and were watching you?"

-Ghostface tenses up big time!

Ghostface: "Well, uh, I'd say that you were full of crap!"

-Ghostface, taking crap in the bathroom stall, flushes the toilet (Flush!)

Michael Myers: "Really?"

-Michael quietly approaches the bathroom stall. Freddy and Jason quietly follow.

Ghostface: "Uh, yeah, really! You don't scare me!"

Michael Myers: "Oh, don't I?"

-Ghostface watches as three shadows step up to his stall at the end of the bathroom.

Ghostface: "Um..."

Michael Myers: "Something wrong, Ghostface?"

-Ghostface shrugs.

Ghostface: "Uh, nothing! Nothing at all!"

-Michael reaches for the bathroom stall door. It is locked from the inside. Ghostface watches as Michael struggles with door.

Michael Myers: "You sure about that? You sound...scared."

-Michael continues struggling with bathroom stall door. Ghostface tenses up and shrugs.

Ghostface: "Oh, not all! I'm fine! I'm just fine and dandy!"

-That's when Michael, with his own sheer strength, finally tears the swinging door off the stall (Cha-ching!). Michael tosses the door aside (Ching!) and looks down at Ghostface. Ghostface tenses up big time!

Michael Myers: "You sure about that, Ghostface?"

-Ghostface shudders and looks down at his cell phone. Then, Ghostface looks back up at Michael. Michael hangs up on his cell phone (Beep!) and puts it away. Ghostface shudders and puts his cell phone away. Michael steps back, and Ghostface can see Freddy and Jason behind him. Ghostface desperately puts the voice box up the mouth of his/her ghost mask.

Ghostface: "I'm sorry! I'm sorry for bothering you! I'll never bother you again!"

-But, Michael just stands there silent. Ghostface, absolutely desperate, freaks out and takes off his/her ghost mask revealing the face...Roman Bridger! He was the killer in "Scream 3," who was behind the entire set up of the "Scream" movies! He was also the director of of the 'Stab' movies! Just last summer, his 'Stab 4' was critical and box-office flop! Michael turns to Freddy and Jason questionably, then back to Roman. He stares him down with his dead-like eyes. Roman tenses up.

Roman Bridger: "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Really, I am! I'll never bother you again! I promise!"

-But, Michael just stands there silent. Then, he whips out his knife (Shing!). Jason shrugs and whips out his machete (Shing!). And Freddy snickers and shows off his clawed hand (Shing!). Roman tenses up big time!

Roman Bridger: "I'm sorry! Please! Leave me alone! I'll never bother you again! Ever!"

-But, Michael starts stepping into the stall. Freddy and Jason follow.

Roman Bridger: "You can't! You can't! Please! You can't!"

-Michael approaches Roman, gripping his knife. Jason shrugs machete and swings it around (Swish!). Freddy snickers and shows off his claws (Shing!). Roman is doomed! As Michael, Jason and Freddy close in on Roman, Roman shudders...

Roman: "Nooooo...!"

CUT TO...Michael's pad, later on in the late evening. They are watching the 11:00 news in Michael's living room.

TV: Cut to a newswoman reporting inside of Pinhead's night club.

Newswoman: "...Just earlier tonight, a brutal murder took place..."

TV: Cut to a quick shot of Roman Bridger in the bloody bathroom stall - knifed, macheted, and sliced beyond recognition.

Newswoman: "...A man, or woman, was brutally killed beyond recognition, in this night club in a bathroom stall. We don't know who is responsible for this, but it is suspected that is was done by multiple killers..."

-Michael shrugs.

Michael Myers: "I can't believe it was Roman Bridger."

Freddy Krueger: "Yeah, who would have thought?"

Michael Myers: "I mean, in the past, when we dealt with John Tate and Kara Strode as Ghostface, I always thought it was Roman at first. And, now it actually turns out to be him!"

-Jason, looking really bloody, shrugs.

Jason Voorhees: "Hey, I'm just glad I was able to get a little excercise!"

Freddy Krueger: "Well, I think its safe to say that the 'Ghostface' chapter is finally closed. Wouldn't you say so?"

Michael Myers: "I'd like to think that. But, you never know."

-Michael shrugs and raises his glass of Molson Ice.

Michael Myers: "Cheers to, hopefully, the final demise of Ghostface!"

-Jason raises his glass of Budweiser.

Jason Voorhees: "Cheers to the bloody end of Ghostface!"

-Freddy raises his glass of Budweiser.

Freddy Krueger: "Yes, cheers to the death of Ghostface, once and for all! Mwa, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!"

-Freddy, Jason and Michael all take their drinks and gulp down their beer.

THE END

Jason vs. Pop music