Chucky: "Oww! Fucker!"

-Chucky gets up and Michael turns to him.

Michael Myers: "Care to explain yourself?"

Chucky: "About what?"

Michael Myers: "You were trying to escape again. You were going to transfer your body into that little boy, weren't you?"

Chucky: "So, what's it to you?"

Michael Myers: "It's everything to me. Ever since you committed yourself to Tiffany and the twins, I promised I'd make sure you'd play nice. That includes not transferring your soul into other people anymore. Those days are over."

Chucky: "Oh, come on!"

Michael Myers: "Don't 'come on' me!"

Chucky: "Do you know how it feels to greet your children, only to see them scared by the sight of you and have them fucking cry? Do you know how it feels to be alienated by your own children? I do. It fucking sucks! Overtime I go to see them, they start crying for no reason. Yet, Tiffany comes in and they immediately get better, as if he she has some magic fucking touch or something!"

Michael Myers: "I know exactly how you feel. Before Stephen was a year old, he always cried at the sight of me. For newborn babies, it can take time to get used to somebody, even there own father."

Chucky: "But, what did you do?"

Michael Myers: "I kept seeing Stephen, trying to be nice and friendly, and eventually, he accepted me."

-Chucky sighs.

Michael Myers: "Give them time. They'll get used to you."

Chucky: "But, they're already used to Tiffany."

Michael Myers: "It's only natural that they'll be used to their mother. I mean, they were in her womb for nine months."

-The elevator stops on Michael's floor, and Michael leads Chucky down the hall to his apartment. All in the while, he passes one of his neighbors, Jerry Seinfeld. Jerry is bickering with Elaine Benice outside his apartment.

Elaine Benice: "...So, I was with Putty last night..."

Jerry Seinfeld: "You got back with him again?"

-Elaine shrugs.

Elaine Benice: "Yeah. And, anyway, we were in bed..."

Jerry Seinfeld: "That's all right. Spare me the details..."

Elaine Benice: "...And, you won't believe this. He used your move!"

Jerry Seinfeld: "My move?"

Elaine Benice: "Your move!"

Jerry Seinfeld: "You mean, the twirl and the..."

Elaine Benice: "Yep!"

Jerry Seinfeld: "I can't believe this! Putty stole my move!"

Elaine Benice: "Last night made wonder why I broke up with him so many times!"

Jerry Seinfeld: "Well, I can't let get him get away with this. I think I'll have to pay him a visit at that garage he works at."

Elaine Benice: "Jerry, please don't!"

Jerry Seinfeld: "I have to, Elaine! A man's move is his own signature! Putty has no right to use my move!"

Elaine Benice: "But, it's the best sex I've had since..."

Jerry Seinfeld: "Since when? Me?"

-Elaine doesn't know what to say.

Elaine: "Um..."

-That's when Newman, Seinfeld's nemesis, intrudes.

Newman: "Hello...Jerry!"

Jerry Seinfeld: "Newman!"

-Michael leads Chucky to his apartment door. That's when they see the light flicking from beneath the door turn to darkness.

Michael Myers: "Pinhead's here."

-They wait for a moment for the light to go back on. The lights go back on, and Michael and Chucky walk inside. Michael shuts the door behind him and greets Pinhead.

Michael Myers: "Hey, Pinny."

Pinhead: "That's Pinhead to you!"

Michael Myers: "Yeah, yeah."

-Michael turns to everybody.

Michael Myers: "Who wants some beer while we wait for Leatherface?"

Freddy Krueger: "Me!"

Jason Voorhees: "I'll have one."

Chucky: "I want Heiniken!"

Pinhead: "I might as well. Get me Heiniken."

-There's a knock on Michael's front door. Michael goes to answer it.

Michael Myers: "Leatherface?"

Leatherface: "Yeah."

-Michael opens the door to reveal Leatherface wearing an overcoat. He lets Leatherface in.

Michael Myers: "Nice coat, Skinface."

Leatherface: "Thanks!"

Michael Myers: "Hiding food under there?"

Leatherface: "Oh, uh, no. Not at all!"

Michael Myers: "You're a terrible liar. Open your coat."

Leatherface: "But, I don't have anything!"

Michael Myers: "Open your coat."

-Leatherface sighs and opens his overcoat revealing several inside pockets with human limbs sticking out.

Michael Myers: "Wow. More pockets than you need."

Leatherface: "Yeah..."

-Michael goes through the inside pockets of Leatherface's overcoat.

Michael Myers: "Let's see...you got an arm, a hand, a gut, a lung, and look at this, even a loaf of bread! What were you going make? A hand sandwich?"

-Freddy, Jason and Chucky, laugh. Pinhead prepares the Poker table.

Michael Myers: "Okay. Now, the outside pockets."

-Leatherface sighs and closes his overcoat. Michael goes through the outside pockets.

Michael Myers: "And, what do you have in here? Fingers, toes, thumbs, and what's this, barbecue suace? Don't tell me you were going to have chicken fingers!"

-Freddy, Jason and Chucky, laugh again. Pinhead waits at the Poker table.

Michael Myers: "What can I say? Very elaborate, Leatherface. But, nice try. Give me your overcoat."

Leatherface: "No!"

Michael Myers: "Give me your overcoat!"

Leatherface: "I don't want to!"

Michael Myers: "You know the rules of my pad. You can kill people, but you can't eat them."

-Chucky snickers. Michael turns to Chucky.

Michael Myers: "Oh, and also, no use of voodoo is allowed."

-Chucky groans. Michael turns to back Leatherface.

Leatherface: "Oh, come on!"

Michael Myers: "Give me your coat."

-Leatherface sighs and takes off his overcoat.

Michael Myers: "You're mean."

-Leatherface hands his overcoat to Michael, and Michael heads over to the window.

Leatherface: "What are you doing?'

-Michael opens up the window.

Leatherface: "What do you think you're doing??"

-Leatherface runs over the window. Before he can stop him, Michael tosses the overcoat through the window and drops it.

Leatherface: "No!"

-Leatherface looks out the window and watches as the overcoat disappears out of sight. Down on the ground, a homeless man looks in awe as he sees an overcoat fall from the heavens of the night sky.

Homeless Man: "Oh, my!"

-The homeless man tries to stand beneath the overcoat is landing. He catches it and upon impact, the overcoat knocks homeless man to the ground. People on the sidewalk look in shock as the homeless man gets up carrying the overcoat with human limbs sticking out all over the place. They freak out and a woman points him out.

Woman: "Murderer!"

Homeless Man: "What, me?"

-A police officer arrives to the scene and looks in awe.

Police Officer: "Oh...my..."

Homeless: "What? It wasn't me! I saw it falling from the sky!"

-The police officer arrests the homeless man disgusted.

Police Officer: "Yeah...sure."

-The police officer takes the homeless man away.

Homeless Man: "But, it wasn't me! It fell from the sky!"

Police Officer: "You're going to be put away for a very long time, buddy."

Homeless Man: "No! It wasn't me!"

-Back in his pad, Michael shuts his window.

Michael Myers: "Sorry Leatherface, I had to do it. I can't afford to have human stench in my pad."

Leatherface: "I can't believe you!"

Michal Myers: "But, I will buy you a new coat. How much did that cost?"

Leatherface: "That doesn't matter. All that mattered was the food."

Michael Myers: "Of course. With you, it's all about eating the disgusting leftovers of human remains."

Leatherface: "I can't help that I prefer eating people. I just do. It's how I was raised."

-Pinhead gets impatient waiting at the Poker table.

Pinhead: "Enough with this nonsense! On with game!"

Michael Myers: "Relax, Pinhead. We had to wait long on enough for you, Chucky and Leatherface, to arrive. Relax. Enjoy yourself."

-Pinhead sighs. Michael turns to Leatherface.

Michael Myers: "Care to have some beer? I was just preparing some for everyone else."

Leatherface: "Uh..."

Michael Myers: "Oh, that's right, your cannibalistic freak! You already eat people for food. I suppose you drink human piss for drinks too?"

-Freddy, Jason and Chucky, laugh. Pinhead waits impatiently at the Poker table.

Leatherface: "Ha, ha. I'll have Budweiser, thanks."

-Michael goes over to the kitchen to get them their beers.

Michael Myers: "Oh, do you guys want Cuban cigars while at it?"

Freddy Krueger: "Why not?"

Jason Voorhees: "Hell, yeah!"

Chucky: "Freakin' A!"

Leatherface: "Yeah."

Pinhead: "Oh, why not?"

-Michael prepares their beer and Cuban cigars. Moments later, Michael comes back with their beer and Cuban cigars. He also sets up bowls chips and doritos on the table. Leatherface shudders.

Pinhead: "Starting bids: $100!"

Michael Myers: "That's a bit high to start with. But unless the rest of you are okay with that..."

Chucky: "Why the hell not? I'll only be making more money for Tiffany, and the twins!"

Freddy Krueger: "If its $100 dollars I'm betting, it's $100 dollars I'm winning...every round!"

Pinhead: "We'll see about that!"

-Jason and Leatherface shrug.

Michael Myers: "All right. Starting bids are $100."

 

-Michael starts to shuffle the cards, but Pinhead swipes the cards from him.

Pinhead: "I'll do that, thanks!"

-Pinhead shuffles the cards with his quick hands and hands everyone their cards. Freddy, Jason, Michael, Chucky, Pinhead and Leatherface, look at their cards and put on their Poker faces. Leatherface actually puts on his hungry face while Jason can't on his Poker face. He has terrible cards! Out of curiousity, he tries to look at Freddy's cards. Freddy notices and swipes Jason arm with his claw.

Freddy Krueger: "I keep telling you, pussface. Look at my cards, and you won't want to sleep again! Actually, it will be 'Freddy vs. Jason' all over again! I'll kick you around like a pinball around my dreamworld!"

Jason Voorhees: "And, I'll beat the living shit out of you in reality. Let me assure, I won't go too lightly on you this time!"

Freddy Krueger: "Oh, yeah?!"

-Freddy gets up to attack Jason. Jason gets up to attack Freddy back. Michael gets up to stop them.

Michael Myers: "Freddy! Jason! Stop! This isn't 'Freddy vs. Jason 2,' it's Poker."

-Michael turns to Freddy.

Michael Myers: "Fred, stop riling Jason up like that. You know its easy to challenge him."

Jason Voorhees: "Hey!"

-Michael turns to Jason.

Michael Myers: "And, stop looking trying to look at our cards, Jason!"

-Freddy laughs. Jason groans. They all sit back down. Michael turns to Pinhead.

Michael Myers: "So, what's up with the high stakes, Pinhead? Have more confidence tonight?"

Pinhead: "Oh, I've always had plenty of confidence. It's just the cards that have cheated me, and kept me from rightfully winning in previous games."

Michael Myers: "Yeah, sure. But, you win most of our Poker games anyway. You're the master."

Pinhead: "Yes. Yes, I am. I just feel like playing it higher tonight."

Freddy Krueger: "That's fine needleface. If you want to lose more money tonight than you did last week, that's just fine in my book!"

Pinhead: "Don't push me, Fred!"

-Freddy imitates Pinhead.

Freddy Krueger: "'Don't push me, Fred!'. You think you're really so tough, Pinny?"

Pinhead: "Yes! And, that's Pinhead to you!"

Freddy Krueger: "Yeah, yeah. Pinhead, Needleface, Pinny, you're still the Prince of Boredom to me!"

Pinhead: "The Prince of boredom?! Why, you!"

-Suddenly, the lights go out and a hook attached chain comes out of the darkness of the room going for Freddy.

Michael Myers: "Pinhead, stop!"

-The hook-attached chain stops in its tracks, just inches away from Freddy. Freddy shudders.

Michael Myers: "Again, this is Poker. Not 'Freddy vs. Jason 2' or 'Freddy vs. Pinhead.' Put that hook away!"

Pinhead: "But..."

Michael Myers: "Now!"

Pinhead: "Why should I listen to you? You're just a washed out boogeyman! And, you've practially restored your soul, what with you caring for the incompetent humans on this Godforsaken planet, like your son, Stephen. You should be taking care of him, not caring for him."

Michael Myers: "Pinhead, I know don't you know mean that. Take that back and put away that chain.

Pinhead: "Do you any idea who you're speaking to?"

Michael Myers: "Pinhead..."

-Pinhead sighs. He lets the hook-attached chain disappear back into the darkness of the room, and the lights go back on.

Michael Myers: "Good, that's better."

-Pinhead sighs again, then looks back at his cards.

Pinhead: "And, what's this? I've won the first round! I have Full House!"

-Pinhead reveals his cards to be a Full House.

Pinhead: "Any takers?"

-Pinhead sneers at Michael.

Michael Myers: "You got me. I don't have a Royal Flush."

-Freddy, Jason, Chucky and Leatherface, reveal their cards to be nothing, a Flush, nothing and a Straight.

Pinhead: "Ha! I've beat you all this round! Give me your money! Now!!"

-Everyone gives Pinhead $100. Pinhead's swipes the money and smells it.

Pinhead: "Ah. Fresh wins. The best smell next to fresh bodies."

 

-Michael ignores Pinhead and shuffles the cards. He shuffles the cards with his very quick hands and gives everyone their cards. Everyone looks at their cards and puts on their Poker faces. Jason still can't put on his Poker face. His cards are fantastic! Out of curiosity, he tries to look at Chucky's cards. Chucky notices and whips out his knife and voodoo doll of Jason.

Chucky: "Don't fuck with the Chuck!"

-Jason groans and looks back at his cards. Freddy and Michael laugh. Pinhead studies his cards. Leatherface's stomach growls. Michael turns to Chucky.

Michael Myers: "So Chucky, how is 'Seed of Chucky' coming along?"

Chucky: "Just dandy! Just fucking dandy!"

Michael Myers: "That's great to hear. I can't wait to see it. Just saw that new promotional cardboard cut out at the movie theater."

Chucky: "You mean the one with me and Tiffany holding our 'seed', and the seed's face is cut out, so people can put their face through?"

Michael Myers: "Yeah, I couldn't stop laugh when I saw it this weekend!"

Chucky: "Yeah, Rogue Pictures is promoting my movie more than Universal ever did. Universal didn't even try."

Michael Myers: "But, didn't they immediately push for 'Child's Play 3' when the first sequel came out?"

Chucky: "Yeah, they rushed my third film, but they only did that so they could get the whole 'killer doll' phenomenon out of the way. They sure fucking did. They were surprised and embarrassed of the success of 'Child's Play 2,' so they squeezed 'Child's Play 3' nine fucking months later. They couldn't even wait a fucking year. And, after that third film, audiences were tired me. Universal totally used me!"

Jason Voorhees: "Just like how Paramount used me! They had me go up against Carrie and sent me to New York. And, it wasn't even New York! They really filmed it in British Columbia up in Canada! They couldn't even do the simplest thing!"

Michael Myers: "Hey, Dimension is way worse Universal and Paramount! They totally fucked up 'Halloween 6: My Curse," and now Moustapha Akkad won't even go back to that story line. So, of course, he came up with a fresh story line, and now it seems that he won't even stick with that one. Akkad is truly messing up my series."

Pinhead: "What about me? I'm stuck with Dimension too. They completely messed up the masterpiece 'Hellraiser: Bloodline' should have turned out to be. And now, my series stuck in straight-to-video hell! And, to top it off, me and my 'Hellraiser' elements were hardly used in 'Hellraiser: Inferno' and 'Hellraiser: Hellseeker.' You guys were not used, I was!"

Freddy Krueger: "'Hellraiser: Bloodline," a masterpiece?"

-Freddy laughs his heart out.

Pinhead: "Hush, you fool!"

-Freddy shuts up.

Pinhead: "I'm aware of the botched mess 'Hellraiser: Bloodline' is now, but believe me, had director Kevin Yagher's work not been cut up so badly, the film would have been so much better."

Freddy Krueger: "Yeah, well, you guys really don't know what it is like to be used. New Line Cimema used me like a freakin' guinea pig. I had a good scary presence in the first couple of 'A Nightmare on Elm Street' films, but then they started using me to entertain the freakin' MTV audience in the late 80's and early 90's, and turned me into a freakin' comedian. From 'A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: The Dream Master' to 'Freddy's Dead,' I was one big joke."

Leatherface: "Actually, you guys have nothing on me. I started out great in 1974 with 'The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.' I was a scary figure, Tobe Hooper a well looked upon director, and the film would inevitably turn out to be a cult classic. Then, in 1986, they did the first of few inferior sequels to follow. Compared to my original classic, the sequel turned out to be one big joke, a bad one at that, and they made me out to be nothing more than a pussy. I was embarrassed."

-Freddy, Jason, Michael, Chucky and Pinhead, look at Leatherface in dismay.

Leatherface: "Then in 1989, they gave me another chance and gave my own film, entitled 'Leatherface: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre III.' I had my scary edge back, but, the movie was completetly botched up the MPAA. I wasn't looking any better than I was before. And in 1994, they completely embarrassed me in 'The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Next Generation,' when they made me act and dress up like a transvestite. I thought it couldn't get any worse than that, but I was mistaken."

-Freddy, Jason, Michael, Chucky and Pinhead, look at Leatherface in more dismay.

Leatherface: "And recently, New Line had the sheer audacity to remake my classic movie. My movie didn't need to be remade! At all! It wasn't outdated! But, they still did it. And when they did, they didn't even call me back. They replaced me with some bozo. That really pushed my buttons, and that's why I retaliated, chainsaw and all, on an unlucky audience who saw the premier of the remake last year. You guys have no idea what its been like to be me. No matter how sorry you feel for my situation, I still have the worst case scenario. Compared your cases, you guys have not had it as bad as you think."

-Freddy, Jason, Michael, Chucky and Pinhead, turn to each other, then back to Leatherface.

Pinhead: "I stand corrected. We all do. You truly have had it the worst out of all of us. And although we may not ever feel same level of embarrassment, I feel for you."

Michael Myers: "So do I."

Freddy Krueger: "Yeah.

Jason Voorhees: "Yeah, man."

Chucky: "And, I thought I had it bad."

Leatherface: "Thanks."

-Leatherface looks back at his cards.

Leatherface: "I think I won. I have a Full House!"

-Leatherface reveals his cards to be a Full House.

Pinhead: "I am truly sorry, but I have the upper hand."

-Pinhead reveals his cards to be a Royal Flush. Leatherface sighs.

Michael Myers: "You won again. You're on a roll."

Pinhead: "Yes, it appears so."

Freddy Krueger: "We'll see about that."

Pinhead: "Yes, we will."

-Everyone gives Pinhead another $100 dollars.

 

-Chucky shuffles the cards with his tiny doll hands and hands everyone their cards. Everyone puts on their Poker faces, but Leatherface. Leatherface puts on an hungry face, he's getting hungry.

Pinhead: "Higher bids! $125 dollars!"

Freddy Krueger: "No, $140 dollars!"

Pinhead: "Yes!"

Everyone shrugs.

Michael Myers: "All right."

-Leatherface looks around the table suspiciously, then tries to carefully sneak out a human arm from his jacket. He gets it out and is about to take a bite, when Michael swipes the arm away from him.

Leatherface: "Hey!"

-Michael gets up from the table.

Michael Myers: "I told you, Leatherface."

Leahterface: "This isn't fair!"

-Michael heads over the window.

Leatherface: "No!"

-Michael opens the window and drops the human arm. Leatherface sighs and hangs his head. Down on the ground, a woman starts to cross the street. The human arm falls from the heavens of the night sky and bumps her on the head, knocking her out. The woman falls to the street, and driver of a bus, not able to slow down the bus in time drives over the woman's body leaving her body mangled. Back in his pad, Michael sits back down at the Poker table.

Leatherface: "You are so mean. Hannibal Lector was way nicer."

-Everyone turns to Leatherface in surprise.

Freddy Krueger: "You knew Hannibal Lector?"

Leatherface: "Yeah. Back in the 1970's, before his exploits were found out, I was friends with him. He was a friend of my crazy family. He came over often and served the most glorious human meals!"

Michael Myers: "Well, I'm sorry I have to be keep throwing out your snacks, but I can't have people find human samples here in my pad and get me in trouble."

Leatherface: "But, I'll eat everything! I never leave leftovers!"

Michael Myers: "Yes, I'm sure you don't. But, that's a risk I can't take."

Leatherface: "But, you're a serial killer! And, you have fellow serial killers over all time! And, for Poker!"

Michael Myers: "Yes, but I can only pull so much here in New York. Just look at all the Government agents that find about me."

-Michael gets up from the Poker table and heads over to his closet. He opens up the side-opening doors revealing several FBI agents stabbed to death. Leatherface looks at all the dead agents surprisingly, then hungrily.

Michael Myers: "Don't even think about it."

-Michael closes his closet doors and sits back at the Poker table. Leatherface groans. That's when Jason looks at Pinhead's cards. What he sees are trick cards of himself being torn up apart by Pinhead's chains and killed by various cenobites. Jason turns away and looks back at his cards. Pinhead laughs and switches back to the regular cards. Leatherface turns to everyone at the table.

Leatherface: "So...how did you guys enjoy the remake of my movie when you went out to see its premier last year?"

Pinhead: "I didn't bother with that pointless remake of yours, so don't look at me."

Chucky: "Well, Tiffany and I left before the movie even started, because she got an contraction. I had to taker her to the hospital."

-Leatherface turns to Freddy, Jason and Michael.

Leatherface: "But, you guys were there, weren't you? Yes, I remember seeing all of you."

-Freddy, Jason and Micheal, don't know how to respond. Leatherface caught them at the movie theater upon the premier of "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" remake, when he massacred most of the audience. They had promised to not see the movie.

Michael Myers: "Okay. We promised that would not see the remake of your movie..."

-Leatherface grrrs at Michael.

Michael Myers: "...But, we went anyway to be sure that it didn't live up to your classic original."

Freddy Krueger: "Yeah. I can't say that the film is as terrible as you'd want us to say it is...

-Leatherface grrrs at Freddy.

Freddy Krueger: "...But, it honestly wasn't half bad for remake of your movie. It was a decent. However, it still didn't live up to your film."

Michael Myers: "Definitely not. Not at all."

Freddy Krueger: "The remake was more pointless than Jason's attempts to look at our cards."

Jason Voorhees: "Hey!"

Leatherface: "I see."

-Leatherface turns to Jason.

Leatherface: "And, you?"

Jason Voorhees: "I really hate to say this, but..."

-Leatherface grrrs at Jason.

Jason Voorhees: "...I really liked the remake. It was fun, it was scary and the new Leatherface was absolutely fantastic!"

-Leatherface turns to Jason angrily.

Jason Voorhees: "But, not as fantastic as you! You're still the better Leatherface."

Leatherface: "But, I am Leatherface!"

Jason Voorhees: "Yes, exactly! And, the remake and its Leatherface still have nothing on you and your original."

Leatherface: "Oh, yeah?!"

-Leatherface whips out chainsaw runs in front of Jason. Jason backs away. Michael gets up to stop Leatherface.

Michael Myers: "Leatherface, stop!"

Leatherface: "Why should I? He liked the remake of my movie!"

Michael Myers: "And, so did Freddy and I an extent. But, we'll still watch your original movie over the remake.

Jason Voorhees: "Actually..."

-Michael shoves Jason. Leatherface continues running the chainsaw.

Michael Myers: "Leatherface, drop your chainsaw."

Leatherface: "No!"

Michael Myers: "Drop your chainsaw!"

Leatherface: "But..."

-Freddy gets up to calm down Leatherface.

Freddy Krueger: "Hey, our liking the remake doesn't change our perspective of you and your classic 'Chainsaw' movie. We still prefer you and your original movie. So does Jason."

-Freddy turns to Jason.

Freddy Krueger: "Don't you, Jason?"

Jason Voorhees: "Yes! Yes I do!"

Freddy Krueger: "So, put the chainsaw away, and let's get back to Poker."

-Leatherface sighs and turns off his chainsaw. He sits down and puts his chainsaw away. Freddy and Michael sit down after. They all look back at their cards.

Pinhead: "Well, now that, that disagreement is over..."

Michael Myers: "Sorry Pinhead, I have the upper hand this time."

Pinhead: "What? No!"

-Michael reveals his cards to be a Royal Flush.

Pinhead: "Argh, no!"

Freddy Krueger: "Argh, yes! You can't win every round, Pinhead. Eventually, I'll have the pleasure of beating you too tonight!"

Pinhead: "I don't know about that!"

Freddy Krueger: "Well, I do!"

-Everyone gives Michael $140 dollars

 

They start the next round, and Leatherface shuffles the cards and hands everyone their cards.

Pinhead: "Higher bids! $175 dollars!"

Freddy Krueger: "Yeah, $175 dollars!"

-Everyone shrugs. Michael turns to Jason.

Michael Myers: "Your copycat is still out on the loose."

-Michael whips out an Inquirer tabloid newspaper. On the cover are more photo's of Jason apparently killing people at a funeral, garage and water park.

Freddy Krueger: "Man, whoever is doing that must be really trying to get your attention."

Jason: "I know! I can't wait to find out who it is!"

Freddy Krueger: "Then, to slaughter the copycat, right?"

Jason Voorhees: "Of course!"

Michael Myers: "This copycat is way too obvious. It can't Jason."

Jason Voorhees: "Hey, that could be me! Why couldn't it be me?"

-Michael hands Jason the tabloid newspaper directly in his face.

Michael Myers: "Think about it. There is actual photos of you killing people. The real Jason, you, would never let anyone get away. Not even reporters. No one would escape your wrath. That reporter would have been macheted before he flashed that camera at you."

Jason Voorhees: "Hey, that's right!"

-That's when Jason notices something in one of the pictures and analyzes it.

Michael Myers: "What is it?"

Jason Voorhees: "I can't believe it!"

Freddy Krueger: "What?"

Jason Voorhees: "My copycat stole my move!"

Michael Myers: "Your move?"

Jason Voorhees: "You know, one of my techniques in, um, killing people."

Freddy Krueger: "Well, duh! That's why that person is a copycat."

Jason Voorhees: "Yeah, but there is no way that the copycat could know that move. That's my move. I don't show it anyone!"

Michael Myers: "Which move is it?"

Freddy Krueger: "Yeah, I want to know too."

Jason Voorhees: "I'm not telling."

Michael Myers: "Oh, come on. We're all serial killers here."

Freddy Krueger: "Yeah, we aren't going to tell, or, do your move."

-Jason sighs.

Jason Voorhees: "All right."

-Jason turns to Michael.

Jason Voorhees: "I'll tell you."

Freddy Krueger: "Oh, come on!"

-Jason whispers into Michael's ear.

Jason Voorhees: "It's when I take my machete and...."

-Freddy and Chucky turn to each other wondering with curiosity what Jason's move is. Leatherface's stomach growls. Pinhead studies his cards. Jason finishes whispering his move to Michael.

Michael Myers: "Oh, that move!"

Jason Voorhees: "Yeah!"

Michael Myers: "I've seen you use it a couple of times in your movies."

Jason Voorhees: "Exactly! That's why its my move."

Pinhead: "And, now it's time for my move! I won this round with a Flush."

Michael Myers: "That's risky, you know. Anyone of us could have Full House or Royal Flush."

Pinhead: "But, neither of you do, do you?"

-Freddy, Jason, Michael, Chucky and Leatherface, shrug.

Pinhead: "I thought so. Welcome to oblivion!"

-Everyone gives $140 dollars.

Michael Myers: "You really have that magic touch tonight, Pinhead."

Freddy Krueger: "I wasn't expecting this. I'm running out of dough. I need to win soon."

Jason Voorhees: "Me too."

Chucky: "Damn it!"

Leatherface: "I'll win eventually."

Pinhead: "Personal needs...such a fertile ground for planting the seeds of torment."

Freddy, Jason, Michael, Chucky, Pinhead and Leatherface, start the fifth round of Poker. Jason shuffles the cards and hands everyone their cards. Everyone, but Leatherface and Jason, put on their Poker faces. Leatherface is getting hungry! Jason can't put on his Poker faces. His cards are fantastic again! Leatherface's stomach growls, much more than before. Everyone at the Poker table hears it.

Freddy Krueger: "What was that?"

Jason Voorhees: "I think that was an earthquake!

Freddy Krueger: "I could have sworn I heard something."

-Leatherface looks around trying not to be obvious.

Michael Myers: "No, that was just Leatherface. He must be getting hungry!"

-Freddy, Jason, Chucky and Michael, laugh. Pinhead studies his cards. Michael turns to Freddy as if too mock Leatherface.

Michael Myers: "Would you like some chips, Fred?"

-Freddy goes along with it.

Freddy Krueger: "Why, yes I would, Mike! Thank you for asking!"

-Michael hands Freddy the bowl of chips and Freddy stuffs a handful in his mouth. Freddy purposely chews the chips loudly to annoy Leatherface.

Freddy (while chewing): "CRUNCH! CRUNCH! CRUNCH!..."

-Leatherface sighs and shudders. Jason goes along with it and turns to Michael.

Jason Voorhees: "Hey Mike, you wouldn't mind handing me the bowl of doritos, would you?"

Michael Myers: "Not at all, Jay! But, I don't want to be rude."

-Michael turns to Leatherface, holding the bowl of doritos directly in his face. Leatherface shudders.

Michael Myers: "Would YOU like some doritos, Leatherface?"

-Leatherface shudders at the thought.

Leatherface: "No thanks."

Michael Myers: "I'm sorry. I didn't hear you."

Leatherface: "I said, no thank you!"

Michael Myers: "Oh, alright. You don't have to be rude about it."

Leatherface: "Whatever."

-Leatherface shudders again as Freddy is still crunching the chips in his mouth.

Freddy Krueger (while chewing): "...CRUNCH! CRUNCH! CRUNCH!..."

-Michael hands Jason the bowl of doritos and Jason grabs handful of them. He also crunches the doritoes as loudly as possible.

Jason Voorhees (while chewing): "CRUNCH! CRUNCH! CRUNCH!..."

-Leatherface shudders.

Freddy and Jason continue crunching their food.

Freddy and Jason (while chewing): "...CRUNCH! CRUNCH! CRUNCH!..."

-Leatherface shudders again and freaks out.

Leatherface: "I can't take it anymore!"

-Leatherface grabs the bowls of chips and doritos, and throws them across the room.

Michael Myers: "What was that about?"

Leatherface: "I know you guys are taunting me about my eating habits. Leave me alone! You're making me feel more hungry!"

Michael Myers: "Then, why don't eat something finally? I have plenty of food in my fridge. There's pork chops, cheeses and meets for sandwiches, Chinese take-out..."

-Leatherface shudders again.

Leatherface: "But, I don't want that! I want to eat people!"

Michael Myers: "I'm sorry, Leatherface. I don't carry people in my fridge."

Leatherface: "You know I mean! Let me eat somebody! Somebody in this apartment building! I'm hungry!"

Michael Myers: "You should have thought about that before coming over for Poker."

Leatherface: "Why are you uptight about eating people in your pad? Really?"

Michael Myers: "I just don't condone it. But, you know what? If you must eat right now, go outside my pad and look for one of those glorious snack choices you crave. Go ahead. Just consider your part in Poker tonight over."

-Leatherface gets up and looks at the front door of Michael's pad. Then, he looks back at his cards. Then, back to the front door. And again back to his cards. Finally, he sits back down and looks at his cards. He had a feeling about them.

Michael Myers: "Well, I'm glad that matter is solved."

-That's when Jason tries to look at Chucky's cards again. Chucky whips out his knife and voodoo doll of Jason.

Chucky: "Don't fuck with the Chuck!"

Jason Voorhees: "Oh, yeah?"

-Jason whips out his machete and voodoo doll of Chucky.

Jason Voorhees: "Ha!"

Chucky: "You really want to learn a lesson, don't ya?"

-Chucky stabs the voodoo doll of Jason with his knife.

Jason Voorhees: "Ow!"

-Jason stabs the voodoo doll of Chucky which his machete.

Chucky: "Ah!"

-Chucky stabs the Jason doll several more times.

Jason Voorhees: "Ow! Ow! Ow!"

-Jason stabs the Chucky doll several more times.

Chucky: "Ah! Ah! Ah!"

-Chucky and Jason both their voodoo dolls of each other. Freddy and Leatherface laugh at antics between Chucky and Jason. Pinhead studies his cards.
Chucky and Jason: "Ow! Ah! Ow! Ah!"

-That's when Michael whips out his knife and voodoo doll of Chucky and Jason.

Michael Myers: "Will you guys grow up, or do have to teach you myself?"

-Chucky and Jason turn to each other, then to Michael. They both whip out voodoo dolls of Michael and stab it.

Michael Myers: "OW!!"

-Michael stabs his voodoo dolls of Chucky and Jason

Chucky and Jason: "Ow! AH!!"

-Chucky and Jason stab their Michael dolls.

Michael Myers: "OW!! OW!!"

-Michael stabs his voodoo dolls of Chucky and Jason again.

Chucky and Jason: "OW!! AH!! OW!!"

-Chucky and Jason turn to each other. Freddy and Leatherface laugh more at the antics between Chucky, Jason and Michael. Chucky sneers at Jason and stabs his voodoo doll of him.

Jason Voorhees: "Ow! Ow! OW!!"

-Michael stabs his voodoo doll of Chucky.

Chucky: "Ah! AH!! AH!!"

-Chucky is about to stab his Michael doll, when Jason stabs his Chucky doll.

Chucky: "Ah! Ah! Ah!"

-Chucky turns to Jason and Michael and is about to stab his voodoo dolls of them once more, when the lights go out. Hook-attached chains come out of the darkness and pull back Chucky's, Jason's and Michael's chairs, leaning them back.

Pinhead: "Stop this nonsense at once!"

Michael Myers: "Pinhead?"

Pinhead: "Yes, you heard me. I'm telling YOU to relax."
-Chucky, Jason and Michael, all look at Pinhead in surprise.

Pinhead: "Stop this voodoo nonsense at once...or else...I'll tear your souls apart!"

-The chains unhook from the chairs and disappear into the darkness. The lights go on revealing that the chairs Chucky, Jason and Michael, sat on fell over and they lay floor. Chucky, Jason and Michael get up and settle themselves back at the table.

Freddy Krueger: "Pinhead sure showed you guys!"

-Jason and Michael are back sitting down. Chucky sets the stack of books on his chair and climbs up. Pinhead turns to Freddy.

Pinhead: "And, I'll show you too when I beat you tonight!"

-Freddy snickers.

Freddy Krueger: "When?"

-Pinhead reveals his cards to be a Full House.

Pinhead: "Right now."

Freddy Krueger: "Oh. Well, I'll still finally win a round and beat your ass. I always do."

Pinhead: "We'll see about that."

Freddy Krueger: "Of course we will. In fact, I want to raise the bids once more. $200 dollars!"

Michael Myers: "You sure you want bet that much?"

Freddy Krueger: "Of course! I have the the stamina."

-Michael turns to everyone else.

Michael Myers: "You guys want to that much. You guys even have any more money to bet?"

Jason Voorhees: "I still have 'Freddy vs. Jason' money left over."

Chucky: "Hell, yeah!"

-Leatherface shrugs

Leatherface: "Why not?"

Michael Myers: "All right."

-Everyone gives Pinhead $175 dollars. Pinhead swipes the money from their hands and smells it.

Pinhead: "Ah...more fresh wins."

-That's when Michael realizes he has no more money to bet. So does Jason, Chucky and Leatherface. They either have a little money left or none. They underestimated how much money they had. Michael turns to Pinhead.

Michael Myers: "Would you mind if we took a little break before the last round?"

Pinhead: "Go ahead! Take as long as you need! But, it doesn't matter, you'll still lose!"

Michael Myers: "Yeah..."

-Michael leads Jason, Chucky and Leatherface, into the kitchen.

Michael Myers: "I don't know about you guys, but Pinhead's been on a roll tonight."

Jason Voorhees: "Sure has. I don't even have enough money to play one more round."

Chucky: "Me neither."

Leatherface: "Same with me."

Michael Myers: "I'm out of dough, too. But, you know what, Pinhead's been on too much of a mean streak tonight and I don't want him going back to hell with all our money."

Chucky: "Me neither."

-Leatherface's stomach growls.

Jason Voorhees: "We could always just kill a bunch of people and take their money."

Michael Myers: "Of course we could, but that's no fun. I don't want Pinhead to get away with tonight's game."

Chucky: "We need a plan."

Michael Myers: "And, I got one."

-Leatherface's stomach growls again. Everyone hears it.

Michael Myers: "Leatherface, tell your stomach to hold it."
Leatherface: "I can't anymore! I'm hungry! I need nourishment!"

Michael Mers: "Again, you should have thought before..."

Leatherfaces: "Come on, Michael! Please! PLEASE!! I neeeeed foooood!"

-Michael sighs.

Michael Myers: "Alright. Go in the closet and gobble up all those FBI agents."

Leatherface: "All right!"

-Leatherface goes to get his chainsaw.

Michael Myers: "But, don't use your chainsaw. It will make too much noise. Just eat them up."

Leatherface: "Okay!"

Michael Myers: "And, whatever you do, don't leave anything behind."

Leatherface: "Don't worry about me. I never leave leftovers. I eat everything!"

Michael Myers: "Yes, I'm sure you do."

-Leatherface opens the side-opening doors of Michael's closet and goes inside to start eating up the FBI agent's bodies. Michael closes the closet after him.

Leatherface: "Mmmm! Delicious!"

-Michael goes back to the kitchen.

Chucky: "So, what's your plan?"

Michael Myers: "Well, what we have to do is trick Pinhead. I'm not saying we're going to cheat. We're just going to trick Pinhead into thinking he's got superior cards, whether our cards are fantastic or not. We're going to manipulate him. By doing this, he may get rid of good cards, a move that he'll pull thinking he's in the top position in this round. We're going to beat him at his own game. Here's my plan..."

Later on, Freddy, Jason, Michael, Chucky, Pinhead and Leatherface, start the final round of Poker.

Michael Myers: "Pinhead...Jason, Chucky, Leatherface and I, don't have enough money to bet for this round. However, we are going to bet something else."

-Michael whips out a big, sharp kitchen knife with blood stains all over it. This is the knife I used to kill my older sister Judith with in 1963. Some time ago, I managed to find get my hands on it from the evidence locker it was place in after her murder."

Pinhead: "Hmm...I see the value in that."

-Chucky whips out his amulet, the jewel-attached necklace he uses to transfer his soul to other bodies.

Chucky: "I will bet my amulet. This what I use to transfer my soul to other people. The jewel is worth hundreds of dollars."

Pinhead: "I see."

-Jason whips out his bloodstained machete.

Pinhead: "A machete? This better not be one of your many machetes you keep in storage."

Jason Voorhees: "This isn't just any machete. This is the machete that, that counselor used to decapitate my mother with. I got my hands on it later, and have used it since. There are blood stains on that are as old as quarter of a century."

Pinhead: "Okay, I see value in that."

-Pinhead turns to Leatherface.

Pinhead: "And, you?"

-Leatherface picks his chainsaw from the floor.

Pinhead: "A chainsaw? How many of those do you have?"

Leatherface: "I have a collection of chainsaws, but none of them match up the value of this one. This was the special chainsaw given to me in 'Leatherface: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre III' by my crazy family. It specifically has 'The Saw is Family' written on it."

Pinhead: "Hmm...yes, there's sentimental value in that as well. I accept your prized positions. I will make a gold mind with them when I win this round and sell them on e-bay! But still, you're putting a sense of self sacrifice in this game I can't ignore. In that case, I will bet all the money I've won tonight along with...

-Pinhead whips out his puzzle box.

Pinhead: "...My puzzle box!"

Michael Myers: "You don't have to do that, Pinhead."

Pinhead: "But, I want to. To show equal respect to all of you for sacrificing your prized possessions."

Freddy Krueger: "Then, that only means that you'll losing your puzzle box. Because, I will, no doubt, beat you this round!"

Pinhead: "You think you will, but you won't."

Freddy Krueger: "Oh, I will. In fact, I'll bet my most prized possession..."

-Freddy takes off his claw.

Freddy Krueger: "...My claw!"

-Everyone at the table looks in awe as Freddy has taken his desired claw off his burnt hand. He has never taken it off before.

Freddy Krueger: "I still have the money to bet $200 dollars this round, I'll keep to that. But, I'm going to bet my precious claw as well, seeing as how all of you are placing your prized possessions on the line."

Pinhead: "Your claw? Wow, I'll be even richer now!"

Freddy Krueger: "You really think so? Then, let's play."

Pinhead: "Yes!"

-Pinhead shuffles the cards with his quick hands and hands everyone their cards. Everyone puts on their Poker faces. Even Leatherface is able to put on his Poker face, now that he has finally gotten to eat. Michael turns to Pinhead.

Michael Myers: "Pinhead, I've been meaning to ask you something."

Pinhead: "About what? About how you'd like to lose? I'll make it simple for you: just come here and lose while you still have the option of losing quickly!"

Michael Myers: "No, no, no. Not that. What I want to ask you is...how did you get your name? I mean, obviously, you have pins sticking in your head, but there has to be more to it than that."

Pinhead: "I don't think anyone has ever asked me that before. Maybe, because it seems obvious. But no, I've never been asked that before. I will answer it for you."

-Pinhead takes a breath.

Pinhead: "Before I discovered the puzzle box, I was once a soldier fighting in Vietnam. I was an explorer of sorts that was curious about finding the most far out things in the universe. So, while I was in Vietnam and when I wasn't fighting, I took a fancy to wondering the villages and finding any artifacts of any sort that seemed beyond our real world. Such was the puzzle box when I stumbled on it."

Michael Myers: "I see."

Pinhead: "Yes. I was very interested in it indeed. The symbols adoring its six sides. The mysteries I could open or solve. I had to get it. I had to pay a hefty price for it, but was worth it. When I first experimented with it, it didn't take long to figure it out. The circle. The circlish symbol on of one the sides was the key to opening it. I pressed my fingers around that symbol...and the box opened! The box opened criss-crossed in a weird fashion and shut down in a star-like form..."

-Jason looks at Michael's cards. What he sees are cards that aren't very substancial.

Jason Voorhees: "Wow, you have really bad cards, Mike!"

Michael Myers: "Jason!"

Jason Voorhees: "You're sure not going to beat Pinhead with cards like that!"

-Pinhead's eyes light up, then he turns to Jason.

Pinhead: "You fool! How dare you keep looking at our cards like this! This is Poker. If you can't handle it, then maybe you shouldn't be playing at all!"

Michael Myers: "Yeah, Jason! You can't keep doing this. Honestly...you're so foolish."

-Jason hangs his head in shame.

Jason Voorhees: "Sorry."

-Michael sighs.

Michael Myers: "It's all right. I could still win."

Pinhead: "You sure about that?"

Michael Myers: "I don't think I'm at loss. I still have hope. That's what it takes to be the boogeyman like me. But please, continue telling your story."

Pinhead: "Yes, that's right...My puzzle box! The puzzle opened up from its star-like form and shut back down into a square again. And, that's when a side opened up and that chains came out!"

Michael Myers: "Oh, boy."

Pinhead: "Several chains with hooks attached to them came out and tore all over my body. My chest, stomach, head, everywhere. The chains pulled me into the box leading me into the inner dimensions of Hell. There, the chains kept going at me. It was a very tortuous experience. Yet, as painful as it was, I loved! I absolutely loved being tortured in this sadistic fashion. It was through this wonderous experience that I became my alter-ego, which I would be would be known as...Pinhead."

Michael Myers: "All this is very weirdly interesting, but how and why did you get the name, Pinhead?"

Pinhead: "There are several different tortuous experiences you can experience. I went through all of them right to the last one, where I would have pins hammered into my head. I was the only person to have solved that box and make it to that sadistic level. I was...the one. That's why I'm known as Pinhead."

Michael Myers: "Wow. I never knew that."

Freddy Krueger: "But, you know what else, Needleface? I won! I won this final round with a Royal Flush!"

-Freddy reveals his cards to be a Royal Flush.

Pinhead: "What? No!"

-Pinhead looks back at his cards.

Pinhead: "This isn't right. This can't be happening. This isn't real!"

Freddy Krueger: "It's more real than one of my nightmare, Needleface! Welcome to your worst nightmare...defeat in Poker!"

Pinhead: "Argh, no!"

Freddy Krueger: "Argh, yes! Welcome to oblivion!"

-Pinhead hangs his head in shame and mutters to himself.

Pinhead: "I never should have got rid of those aces. I've been fooled."

Freddy Krueger: "Don't look so down there. You'll win another time. Now, give me all the money you've won tonight...now!"

-Pinhead sighs and gives him his earnings for the night, $2,235 dollars, as promised. Freddy devides the money up with Jason, Michael, Chucky, Leatherface. He also lets them have their prized possessions back. Except Pinhead's. Freddy holds Pinhead's puzzle box. He fumbles around with it.

Pinhead: "Please be careful with that!"

Freddy Krueger: "You know what I think, Pinny?"

Pinhead: "That's Pinhead to you!"

Freddy Krueger: "I think it's time to send you back home to hell."

Pinhead: "No!"

Freddy Krueger: "Yes!"

-Freddy tries solving Pinhead's puzzle box.

Freddy Krueger: "Now, what were you saying before?...Yes, that's right, the circle on one of the sides..."

-Freddy finds the side with circlish symbol.

Freddy Krueger: "...There it is...Now, I press around the circle..."

Pinhead: "No! Please don't do that!"

-Freddy presses his fingers around the circle and the puzzle box opens up and then shuts down into a star-like form. Freddy tosses the puzzle box back to Pinhead.

Freddy Krueger: "There you go!"

-Pinhead desperately catches his puzzle box. Then the puzzle opens and shuts down back into a square. That's when a side opens up and chains burst out and hook Pinhead' head and body.

Pinhead: "Augh! No!'

-The chains hook him and tear at him. Then, the chains start pulling Pinhead into box.

Pinhead: "No! You can't do this to me!"

-With a strong tug, the chains pull Pinhead side the tiny dimensions of the box and further into the inner dimensions of Hell. As Pinhead is pulled into the puzzle box, he mutters his final words of the night.

Pinhead: "I'll be back! I always come back!"

Chucky: "Hey, that's my line!"

-Pinhead is pulled into the box. The box closes and falls to the floor of Michael's pad.

Jason Voorhees: "It looks like that's the last we'll see of Pinhead for a while."

Michael Myers: "Are you kidding? We'll see him tomorrow night when go over to his night club."

Jason Voorhees: "Oh, that's right."

-Freddy, Jason, Michael, Chucky and Leatherface, laugh after another fun night of Poker.

THE END